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Five star whore's

 

They introduce themselves with a bitter smile

proclaim there adoration for mile after mile

while working to keep you hid in the dark

dragging out your secrets, setting the mark
 

 Did they bother to read it, or just leave stars?

what did they suggest? did they set the bar?

did they share that commenting is only the tip

or act like they were the only ones doing it?
 

This is a great big place for one and all

upon the weakest link all the shit will fall

some will tell you what you want to hear

while others will prey upon your inner fear
 

But to say that the bad is greater than good

proves only that they never really understood

talking shit to people that don’t play the game

will only result in their eventual earned shame

 

— DawningDaytripper, May 16, 2010

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: Robe valley, WA, USA

Favorite Poets: All of them, for differant reasons. Neopoet poets have influenced me the most over the last 2 plus years. Great teachers. Edgar Allen Poe, Dickens, way to many to list...

More from this author

Critiques

Seren

Seren

16 years ago

Dear Julie

Loved this one the first time and it reads better with that small change lol .... ;) love and biggest hugs Jayne-Chloe x x x x ("Quote:-For every beauty there is an eye somewhere to see it. For every truth there is an ear somewhere to hear it. For every love there is a heart somewhere to receive it.-Ivan Panin")
weirdelf

weirdelf

16 years ago

Spot on.

The incedible arrogance of someone posting a badly written poem accusing newcomers of posting bad poetry then running away only condemns themselves for giving trite meaningless feedback. Those few mentioned are the ones with the courage to help and give critical feedback. Not the arrogant fool who declares "Class dismissed" as if they had ever contributed anything worthwhile. Just patronising biblical quotes and self-embittered martyrdom. Without naming names my intention her is clear and I expect an AEC reprimand, if she gets one too. Jess, Reprehensibly irrepressible,
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years ago

Thanks Elf, I hope that I

Thanks Elf, I hope that I have communicated what ticks me off. And understand where you are coming from. I appreaciate your feedback, time and comment. Julie D.D.
Beauregard

Beauregard

16 years ago

If I may be so bold,

the arrogance appears to have risen to such a level that those-not-named didn't even notice what you wrote in this comment. That is, if I understand what you're saying here. Pity. Kelsey
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years ago

They seem to be oblivious to

They seem to be oblivious to the meaning Kelsey, You can lead a poet to water, you can't make them drink. Thanks for the time and feedback love. We will get the better of these five star whores oneday. Although I would just like to shed the light and teach the lesson to avoid it. Julie D.D.
weirdelf

weirdelf

16 years ago

irrelevant but funny...

I am suddenly reminded of the famous quote (but can't remember who said it) when asked to use the word horticulture in a sentence said "you can lead a whore to culture but you can't make her think". Great minds think alike, eh? Cheers, Jess, Reprehensibly irrepressible, "the alleged short-cut to knowledge, which is faith, is only a short-circuit destroying the mind." [Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged]
weirdelf

weirdelf

16 years ago

it is not a game, is the art of poetry.

It is is not a church, it is is art. It is not mindless fools fools that quote scripture instead of thinking in engaging with with people with different bliefs, It is not people who can not be bothered to improved their craft by learning spelling and grammar. It is not people who in vile arrogance attack others of different beliefs. Do these descriptions decribe somone you might know? Very personally? Cheers, Jess, Reprehensibly irrepressible, "the alleged short-cut to knowledge, which is faith, is only a short-circuit destroying the mind." [Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged]
weirdelf

weirdelf

16 years ago

it is not a game, is the art

it is not a game, is the art of poetry.It is is not a church, it is is art. It is not mindless fools that quote scripture instead of thinking in engaging with people with different bliefs, It is not people who can not be bothered to improved their craft by learning spelling and grammar. It is not people who in vile arrogance attack others of different beliefs. Do these descriptions decribe somone you might know? Very personally? Cheers, Jess, Reprehensibly irrepressible, "the alleged short-cut to knowledge, which is faith, is only a short-circuit destroying the mind." [Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged]
Beauregard

Beauregard

16 years ago

Julie,

there's so much negativity brewing around lately. Religious fights, 5 star whores, people updating their poems without actually editing the poem so they can jump to the front of the stream, ad infinitum. You know our feelings on this topic are mutual. -- For when the venting has run its course: Title: "whore's" --> 'whores' 1.2: "there" --> 'their' 1.3: "hid" --> 'hidden' (or even just delete so that it reads 'keep you in the dark' (like 'keep you out of the loop' or 'keep you out of the know', right?)) Enjoyed the rhyme for the most part. It did seem forced on 2.3/2.4 though. 2.3 didn't make sense to me and I think it's because you were trying to maintain your rhyme. How about something like "Their commenting abuse, they’d never admit/ Or even acknowledge that anyone did it." -- I'm about ready to give up again. I keep losing all hope for this place and leaving. I signed up for the mentor program and put so much effort into making a good solid foundation for my proteges. My first protege wasn't allowed to stay in the program, then my second went MIA on me. Now I'm getting involved in chat and newsletters again. We'll see how that goes. History has shown that democracies never last. I think it's time Neopoet becomes an oligarchy or dictatorship. Kelsey
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years ago

I thank you for your time

I thank you for your time Kelsey, you are my standard for feed back. Thank you for setting one, love you bunchs ewok. I will work on that asap. Although I need to get all my correction in line before updating{i always do} but i want to support Seren in her efforts in making it less an issue, so start with myself. Julie D.D.
Beauregard

Beauregard

16 years ago

It's my pleasure

gotta get all your ducks in a row. Take your time. I'm honored to know that my ideas help. Yeah, Jayne, she's one tough cookie! Cracking down on crime! :) Kelsey
hobo

hobo

16 years ago

Wow lol

wow this is very strong my friend, I like it I am just not sure what part of it I am at lol. great work
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years ago

From what I have seen Hobo,

From what I have seen Hobo, none of it. You are a like a fragrant flower that has just bloomed.. I love you new people. None of this was mention anything you need worry about Hobo, thanks for your time and feedback, I will drop in on you later! Julie D.D.
loved

loved

16 years ago

you know what to say

...FIVE STARS I MEAN GR88888888888888888est creation fantastic imagination of a man where one woman alone can assess as many as she can
Geezer

Geezer

16 years ago

Your message comes in...

loud and clear. I am trying hard to get to everyone, and hope that I don't forget to thank anyone, or to comment on the ones that I get to read. ~ The sheer size of the site, now just overwhelms me, and I rarely have time to do all that I want to. I can see where some are daunted, when they read critiques like Kelsy and Jess leave, with the technical corrections, they may be intimidated. I remember being that way myself. love and hig bugs, ~ Gee
Beauregard

Beauregard

16 years ago

I'm a 4 foot 11 inch

17 year old girl. I guess I don't realize that I can be intimidating. I'm sorry! Kelsey
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years ago

Very scary Kelsey, very

Very scary Kelsey, very scary! But I love that! {try to wear the hat sometimes myself} A little fear does a body good... or maybe thats milk. BOTH! Julie D.D.
Geezer

Geezer

16 years ago

Did you know?...

That lots of people are intimidated by brains? Exellence and dedication, make some people nervous. You and elf, are two of the best critics on the site. You have the technical expertise in poetry, and dedication to the site and craft. There are others here that posess the skills, but have given up on critiquing, because of how it was recieved. Don't abandon us, we need you, and others like you. You will always have my support. I understand, that sometimes irritation causes some of our best critics to leave tact behind, when in the midst of the morass of seeming indifference. [Those shall remain nameless]. However, critics play an important role here, and without you, and others like you, this site would suffer greatly. I admire your integrity, Keep on keeping on, ~ Gee
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years ago

Oh its the leader of the

Oh its the leader of the pack, Your right. Still have to come back to this. As for you take. Worthless with your chip, bad attitude. This IS drivel, its about the horrid five star whores that have infected Neo. Wonder why I was just gonna move on. Which I didn't point at anyone, they pointed it at themselves. Seems stupid, but they walked right in to it. Annie deserved her shitty review. You both make Neo look bad. A good woman, like you would know Indi. I am, which is why you and your gang of five star wannabes who pat eachother on the back and can't take a one star review piss me off so much. There is people here who work there ass off to make... maybe just decent poetry. But because YOU and people like you going around patting eachother on the back give out five stars exchanging who reaches spotlight and evolution, is not fair. And if someone doesn't play your game, this is what they get. Attacked. But don't worry, I expected it. News flash, I like to argue. I said she didn't offer intelligiable conversation to workshop people, oh still didn't spell check it. I didn't call her unintelligent. But you both are proving something else altogether. Julie D.D. and again thats how you comment with out spell check in under 4 mins and still say everything I want. I didn't bother to spell check your comment, but feel free to waste your time somemore acting like my comment spelling is the point.
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years ago

For the record, the only

For the record, the only five stars here are from an innocent newer person, and loved. One of the five star groupies. I am not here for stars, and your one star. Not the first I have had. No biggie. This poem does suck, but it also communicates perfectly. Julie D.D.
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years ago

I suppose you might just be

I suppose you might just be THAT stupid, Seren, well I have no reason to doubt. She uses her stars wisely. As for getting them, she deserves them. Jess. Jess and me have been at eachothers throats, he doesn't have a problem giving me less stars. More likely they agree with me and what inspired this peice. People in spotlight and evolution shit talking Neopoet and new people, while people. Not you admittedly, gave her five stars. So technicaly the intended target, isnt even who is all mad. I will not start using spell check for comments Indi, but feel free to keep spending time correcting my spelling. You don't discriminate Indi? Then what are you doing here? I gave a review you didn't like, to one of your buddys. Not even you. I didn't shooh when told by someone unwilling to have a conversation with. Well I won't name names, but someone interested in helping. And not only that, she shoohed them and anyone else that didn't tell her what she wants to hear. Not to mention she will just sit back and send- let you do her dirty work. And brag that she sent you to do it. Now I purpusfully down voted a smut poem, with crappy grammer. To remove it from evolution. I dislike Annie and You. But I don't hate or discriminate. I simply see through some people and won't just sit there when I see crap representing Neo. The shoohing them like children with incomplete sentances and threats. And what do I got against you. Wheres indi, who knows. Until the shit starts flying. At least you will have a conversation, I can find some appreaciation in that. Here comes Indi to the rescue right. Sure. Keep on believing that. As for spotlight, we agree. I didn't go for or come close, with any of my writes. I to write what pleases and inspires me. I also, before your time. Argued againts stars and public spotlight. Which would include evolution. BUT as part of Neo, as long as it is there I beleive it should represent the BEST of neo, not who cultivated the most five star votes. And has no time to bother with workshop or conversation beside a groupie fest. Facts are we have similar view, but mine extends to how do I make it happen to improve and push Neopoet in the right direction for a growing poetry community. Well I stand against the clicks making this place the cesspool that some people have been claiming. Which is going to lead to me conflicting with those people. I expect a few one stars. So I have a point of being here. Having the argument. Why I voted the way I did on woo woo the man, or whatever. I have laid out all my reason and motivations. NOW why are you here? Julie
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years ago

And not only does she use

And not only does she use the Lord and his words for vindictive sarcastic behavior, she completly mutilates the definition of honesty. I don't like you, but if you started acting like this was a workshop and were willing to have a decent conversation with out hiding behind cliche's and other people. I would get over it all. But I am not holding my breath.
Rett

Rett

16 years ago

Very good Julie

I was going to make some suggestion, but Kelsey beat me to it. Other than the suggestions she made, well done. Respectfully, Rett: “Anyone who sacrifices liberty for security deserves neither.” Benjamin Franklin
Beauregard

Beauregard

16 years ago

I'm getting

pretty darn good at critique. :) All tuckered out with writing and critiquing right now, though. :( Kelsey
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years ago

Yes you are! And I know,

Yes you are! And I know, the real critique takes alot out of a person. Thanks for keeping up with this one, I have decided not to edit it. But I think the reasons are obvious. Julie D.D.
Seren

Seren

16 years ago

Dear Julie

it doesnt matter at the end of the day what anyone thinks but you ... poetry good or bad is just that, poetry ... I have learnt some hard lessons in the last few days but the real lesson ? was forgiving them and moving on which I have already done ... I was hurt I was dismayed YES ~! but at the end of it I know the truth and thats all that matters I gave up giving a fuck love and hugs Jayne-Chloe x x x ("Quote:-For every beauty there is an eye somewhere to see it. For every truth there is an ear somewhere to hear it. For every love there is a heart somewhere to receive it.-Ivan Panin")
A

Arrow

16 years ago

Good grief--

can't we just model the behavior we want to see? Trying to change other people is of limited effectiveness, at best. I know you were just venting DD but look what it's come to.
S

scribbler

16 years ago

blood on my screen

I never expected such behavior on this site.this has nothing to do with poem, but with childish ,vindictive comments by both sides.NOBODY SHOULD BE PERSONALLY ATTACKED HERE!!!!......scribbler
Beauregard

Beauregard

16 years ago

Just read this again

and I must say, the more I read it, the more I love it just the way it is. And for that, I go against my status quo/standards and give stars. Kelsey
DawningDaytripper

DawningDaytripper

16 years ago

Thanks,Love ya bunchs

Thanks, I am not going to edit this, because I don't want to hash out at front of the stream. Love ya bunchs Kelsey! KELSEY FOR AEC! Julie D.D.
K

kelsey

15 years 11 months ago

my s mind made up

you know it thrills when you are certain with what you actually deed i must say am happy with you ok well pen my friend.