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On Jack Daniels and Lab Reports

Ice-white smoky tendrils
drift from chilled cylindrical vessel
filled with pale pink
alcoholic goodness
I shall imbibe slowly
thus savouring
its silky smoothness

Releasing the brain's sphincter
words pour forth on a page
formulas and mechanisms
work together grudgingly
to turn out final solutions
from tedious calculations

It is at this stage
where my mind tends to wander
and the retraction setting on its leash breaks
as thoughts drift to a friend
to my husband
and jealous-like gaze at the cat
who lies in slumber in the sunbeam

And I find
that all is right in my little world
for now.....
— infinite_dwarf, Jul 19, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Region, Country: North Carolina, USA, USA

Favorite Poets: E.A. Poe, Lewis Carroll, Charles Bukowski, Michael McClure, Lawrence Ferlenghetti.

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Critiques

infinite_dwarf

infinite_dwarf

16 years 10 months ago

Good point...

Thanks, Theo, for such a nice review. I see what you mean about the sphincter line, and agree totally. Will change it to something a little less...ehh... gross-sounding? LOL! Have some more work to do at the moment, but will change it later this evening. ~Jess K. ----------------------- "Sundown you better take care if I find you've been creepin' 'round my back stairs. Sometimes I think it's a sin when I feel like I'm winnin' when I'm losing again" - Gordon Lightfoot
Q

Quillsvein1

16 years 10 months ago

excellent imagery

those first three lines, gorgeous: "Ice-white smoky tendrils/drift from chilled cylindrical vessel/filled with pale pink/alcoholic goodness..." there's something of the misty decadent here, the real fantasy poets like Hodgson and Lovecraft when we felt like being a good poet. Wonderful combination of reverie and reality. GB
B

bjp

16 years 10 months ago

Dear Jessica,

Personally, I think that the line, "Releasing the brain’s sphincter" is brilliant. I would urge you to keep it. The context fits like a glove and the metaphor, as the young tend to say, "rocks". Overall the poem is like that pink drink, smooth and soft. Very nice. Brian