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Wounded Knees

Here I am on wounded knees
the wailing walls close in on me
I pray for sweet recovery
to wash me clean

These knees which are so etched with scars
from love's mirror, shattered far
reflecting only glass like shards
of good intention

Worn hands held closely to my chest
I'm out of focus, and the rest
of me remembers still, lest
I forget

These hands so ageing and so dry
ever willing me to try
to open them despite the lies
that love may bring

Swollen sight for hope still looks
what chapter next, within this book
I am love's worm upon a hook
content to be caught

These eyes so deep, so brown, so pained
see through the world, beauty remains
within this one whom love ordained
to look for it

Standing on a precipice
tinged with approaching darkness
I walk the tightening ropiness
of insecurity

These feet so battered and so bruised
so unkempt, so over used
may lead me to a place of truth
and inspiration
— faerybeki, Apr 08, 2009

About This Poem

About the Author

Country/Region: GBR

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Critiques

yenti

yenti

17 years 2 months ago

Faerybeki

As you are feeling tired and forgotten, it has brought to the surface words that I hope are locked usualy in your bad memory bank. The way of bringing those things to where you can deal with them from another point of view is to write as you have, and I will say beautifully written. Now you have put those things on paper, just throw the piece of paper in the fire, and watch how things you cannot change or that can no longer hurt your ways, make a lovely scene of sparks for you, then watch those sparks rejoin the universe as something else, unable to bring you to your knees, ever again. You take good care of you little Raker of Moons, Yours Ian.T
faerybeki

faerybeki

17 years 1 month ago

Ian, thank you for reading

Ian, thank you for reading and your comment. I don't think I even need to burn the paper, sometimes just the act of writing is enough to heave certain thoughts from me! :) That you think it beautifully written means a lot coming from you, who master rhyme and rhythm so well :) Do hope all well with you fellow moon raker, I read you often Ian, although rarely leave a mark, enjoying the rural idylls you transport me to! :) Take care of you too, much love b x
ID

Ink Dragon

17 years 2 months ago

Dear Beki,

another great write from you! I love the rhymes, and the flow was wonderful up to stanza 7, where it broke. Would you consider interchanging stanzas 7 and 8? I think the break in the flow would be appropriate for a final stanza (added drama ;). Just suggesting, ~Nina
faerybeki

faerybeki

17 years 1 month ago

Hi Nina, thanks for reading,

Hi Nina, thanks for reading, glad you liked it, your comments are always hoped for and much appreciated. Will look at the part you mentioned but was important to me to end on a positive note, 'inspiration' rather than 'insecurity' which has more negative connotations, perhaps I will find a way to edit that leaves us both happy! ;) much love b xx
CN

Craig Norris

17 years 1 month ago

don't bury your heart on wounded knees..

Love this Beki, has a poignant feel, beautifully done. Swollen sight for hope still looks what chapter next within this book loves worm caught upon a hook content to be this stanza wriggles for me, others hold me quite still, and some words fell in different places. Craig
faerybeki

faerybeki

17 years 1 month ago

Hi Craig, thanks for your

Hi Craig, thanks for your comment, so glad you loved it! Like your take on this 'wriggly' stanza, love that poems evolve as they impact the reader! :) will look again at that stanza when I address nina's suggestion about the flow! all of course when I have more time! much love b x