Altar of You.

Sounds like grief. I esp. like this line: "and i’m not ready to let you go, yet. So i stay". "Yet" being the all-important word. This poem reminds me of "Remember" by Christina Rossetti. I don't see the need for any revisions (beyond editing).

I heard a far away lark sing the song of the nightingale, as the dawn of midnight revealed itself, and the ghost of you drew near the altar of me. *i see a picture of a young woman awaking at a familiar sound, with the name of a past lover on her lips. Your shimmering breath tickled my feet, your presence here, suddenly, splintered my mind and I fell on my knees at the altar of you. *i find that many women forsake God, for a time, in the memory of a man we've loved and lost. I worshipped at a pedestal the best man I ever knew. *this speaks of grief, of pictures and shrines and fruitless prayers for something that can never be. My heart’s been distracted by pieces of blue and the wisps of him that remained. But now that you’re seeping back into my weeping, these drowning brown eyes see only pain at the altar of you. You shine your soul and steal away again with a smile from my lips, a laugh from the depths, a wiggle of the hips and I dance at the altar of you, and I worship at a pedestal the best man I ever knew. *but who is the best man, the "him" or the "you" I remain right here, a wandering wonderer. The ‘what if’s playing with my smile, the ‘should have’s bleeding from my eyes, and I look and I’m stuck, stood, still at the altar of you. "few women seem to meet the "you" before the "him" if ya get what i mean. You still have the power to blow me away, reak havoc in the corners of my mind, speak exquisite wisdoms into the hollows of my soul, and I’m not ready to let you go, yet. So I stay at the altar of you, and I worship at a pedestal the best man I ever knew. * i like this, but i'm confused about the "him" and the "you". i get the sentiment, though. i like the last line and how is it used more than once. it seems but a fleeting dip into unholy waters. how long can the fluid memory of one man in a woman's life last before it evaporates? i know a few women who would say "forever" with a weary sigh, and more, others who would laugh at their own past devotions.

Hi Beki, I did think I had commented on this, I have read it a few times with pleasure. Apologies for not leaving my mark. Now I think it has been done quite well above. & I can see so clearly the familiarity you speak of... In fact these are themes common to my writing too, we must have similar language (poetry style?) influences I suspect, I have included altars & pedastals in my work too, in quite similar sentiments (I suppose many have). Anyway, Thanks for leading me here again, I have as I said enjoyed this one a few times in the past, some really moving lines in it... sigh! My fave: "You shine your soul and steal away again" & the line Arrow mentions, for the same reason I suspect, dam it can be hard to walk away from things, no matter how bad they are for us, or how much better off we'd be stepping nto a new beginning. xxx Rock cloud huggers! (oh rocks, they are usually so jolly constant, perhaps that's the apeal for us!?! chuckle) Anni "Out beyond the ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there. When the soul lies down in that grass, the world is too full to talk about ideas, language, and even the phrase, "each other" doesn't make any sense."