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The Sky

 The Sky


the sky curves before me
with leftover petrol eyes
glinting in brown refuse pupils
(that told) the truth through their glare
    The Sky
falls before me
  Shatters
in glassy blue brilliance
to the n-th degree
sending the lights all over
    like 
a starlit night at noontime.
flashes pass, and
         all that is left
  are these solar bullets
in the back of my eye


  The sky
    slowly picks itself
up from the ground
  shattered shards
melding triangles of a 
mosaic melange
  and up she went
— sumsum22, Jun 26, 2008

Critiques

C

Catalina

18 years ago

'And Up She Went..."

I love the subtle and gentle feeling of this poem...rushed or not I think that you captured someone ascending from this life to the next eloquently...or at least that was my interpretation of piece.
Q

Quillsvein1

18 years ago

a mysterious

and gorgeous piece of work: i love your style, though i'm not sure what i would call it in technical terms. you have breathtaking imagery in this poem: "are these solar bullets/in the back of my eye"? "melding triangles/of a mosaic melange/and up she went". wow. you know, i occasionally pride myself on being able come up with wild but meaningful automatic images, and i have to say you transcend me completely. fantastic poem, please keep writing.
Blue_Halcyon

Blue_Halcyon

17 years 3 months ago

NO, NO, NO,

You just had to go and put a math reference in there -- didn't you?!?!?! hahaha lol I really liked the imagery that the words created in this one. Awesome poem - (coming from me that means a lot because I'm picky).

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