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Untitled

Words......

My words,

unspoken ones,

when weighted against

personal perception (perched on

your lofty pedestal, called wholesome,

where I have placed you). Slight perversions

of you. Never seem adequate. As if

their mere utterance, somehow

would diminish, us both

 

I should have told you ...

 

Framed in the proper

light you posses a smile,

so infused with wonder,

with beauty, that Angels

weep with envy.

 

I should have told you....

 

When enveloped, adrift

on a sea of ambivalent

black hole days, my greatest

comfort. Was found nestled

in lyrical echos, of your virtuoso voice

 

I should have told you....

 

about, futuristic mental snapshots,

lighting fast, mischievous, unborn

children at play. About back

porch, comfortable silences,

sipping Iced tea.

 

I should have told you .....

 

That, I think I love you,

despite the fact that we just met,

but I couldn't find the proper

vernacular, the exact,

language of longing. I said,

"Hello", instead, and

slowly walked away.

 

        

— vonnegutfan, Feb 16, 2008

Critiques

themoonman

themoonman

18 years 5 months ago

Hi Vonne...

No title..and you spelled angels wrong..but this is very good. I love it when I don't know where the poem is going until the very end...
V

vonnegutfan

18 years 5 months ago

THanks agian Moon I aways

THanks agian Moon I aways need people to catch my silly little mistakes cause I never do, and yes I agree with you on the title issue, I just don't know titles are my bane, and I can never come up with one I am happy with. I am, as always open to suggestions. Thank you again for the read and the feedback. PS. I didn't know where this one was going till the end either
infinite_dwarf

infinite_dwarf

17 years 9 months ago

Von

What do you think of "Regrets Of Things Unsaid" for a title?? Life is short, friend, never miss opportunities for they may never come around again. Ps. got a chuckle at the fact that you didn't know where it was going until the end either... LOL! ~Jess K. ---------------------------------------------------- -"If your mother still drives you to school, you ain't no 'gangsta', pull your damn pants up!" - Bill Engvall
V

vonnegutfan

17 years 9 months ago

Regrets of things Unsaid

I like it a lot actually, may end up using it if that's alright with you. Thanks for all the helpful comments you have been giving me over the last few days.

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