cement headstone

Cathryn was her name

and she was poor

and lived with her sisters

father and mother in a

railroad house

in my hometown

beside the rail line beside

the work sheds

and the little girls

unchecked would love

to bang the sides of

the work truck my father

and fellow workers drove

when they would be backing

up to leave to go about their

duties  they would scream

with delight

made up fun

the exhilaration of it!

then one day my father was

driving  just his day to be

behind the wheel of the

gloss fresh 1975 crew-cab Dodge

stepped on the clutch

put it into reverse

and backed over Cathryns

chest

it was my last day of childhood

also as i sat unaware in class

my brother in a younger grade

they felt the bump

looked at one another

and knew what must have

happened

they had no CPR training then

and anyways they were all in shock

when the policemen showed up

and ambulance the dual treads

of the work truck could be seen

on her dirty small dress

there was a bright plastic pail

sitting where the truck had been

parked

one of the few toys the girls

treasured

she was trying to get her

bucket

that was all

dad was trying to get to

Novar or Burks Falls

we were just studying

the father was so distraught

he smashed the work truck

that took his little daughters

life with a pick handle

he harmed no one at the

scene

the police took him to jail

to hold him for everyones safety

thats what they did back then

i saw the worktruck all smashed

up at the garage on the highway

and got sick feeling

my father!

the police were at home

my father was in tears

my mother took us in the

living room

we moved to an aunts

in case the father came

to try to avenge the girls

death

we were in shock

in school the very next day

my father was a murderer

and we were murderers

children

threats were made

spit snarl move away

my father stopped believing

in God

we stopped going to church

they buried her in a small

cemetary on a hill

and being poor as they

were they made a cement

headstone

i went looking for this one

day and it has crumbled and

vanished

much like the pain has

inside my heart

and my fathers ashes have

been spread

i had forgotten this

until now

   O