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J
JPM
Sep 02, 2007 ⭐ See this poem's read count — a supporter feature

Shadow in the sand

Impressions left by heel and toe

As if showing one the way to go

Forever will wonder who you are

Would follow gladly wide and far

Ghostly footsteps on the beach

Always way beyond my reach

Barefoot i tread your naked print

Young or old you leave no hint

No way of knowing secrets you hide

Soon will be lost in the incoming tide

 

 

— JPM, Sep 02, 2007
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Critiques

T

tomisb

18 years 11 months ago

The sense of the briefest of

The sense of the briefest of times, the way life is a blink and our times together are even shorter. Nicely done. I enjoyed the beach metaphor and the sense of doing it anyway in spite of the futility. This moment when I might find you and we might know each other contrasts nicely against the rising tide and the disapperance of the trace of their passing. Overall, I enjoyed the piece and found myself both touched, entranced and propelled through the poem. Too many, I stop before I get past the opening lines because there is no promise of art, truth or revelation. Thank you. ~ Tom B.

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