Lover Boy

A nice slow paced poem. Your wording is a little off, I will love for you to promise me that forever we will always be, I don't know if you meant to use would or if you purposely used will. The beginning of the poem was a little rocky but I loved the ending. Have a good one. Brittany Rae

nice poetic pace as i read more poems here i want to help and i cant not want to help when i see typos realize real ize i make em too usually im writing fast or have just spelled the same word wrong consistently for thirty some years again i like that pace the way your words flow around your poem

This is sweet and I would work a bit more on the beginning. with your body always make me want more That might be more effective I think you mean thighs instead of thights :-) You might want to add a bit more deffinition to "hit the lights" not sure exactly what you mean there. These are the things that stood out to me after reading "past" them and seeing the sweetness of your poetry. If you make any changes please message me so I can come back :-) Mark L

love struck you are,how do you view people who are apart? looking forward too more, Iknownobox

I know that you meant 'thighs' but the way it turned out just made me laugh. I don't really like your poem. it just really seems like the word vomit of a horny, head over heels teenage girl. I can see what you felt and why you wanted to write about it, but in my opinion.. you didn't write it very well. I'll say.. D- for effort