The Housepainter

He strips away the old
unlike an onion,
each layer was a story
stories of lives, loves and deaths
they tantalise
the defects of character
he fixes are an argument between
beauty is there
was there

until he erases the walls memories

— weirdelf, Jun 10, 2007

About the Author

Region, Country: Sydney, Australia, AUS

Favorite Poets: The Romantics, The Mersey Sound, The Beats and, of course, The Bard

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Critiques

weirdelf

19 years 1 month ago

Will post the original

Also love by the way I love cummings, do you like Dylan Thomas? "In My Craft or Sullen Art" is the poets poem.

andrew

19 years 1 month ago

"based on the feedback"

Ouch. I really like the other version more.

orgami

18 years ago

All is there

well I have come here to visit and have found this poem I wonder what the original was like with the "big words" Great Poem Weirdelf i used to paint local peoples houses as a younger man and teen not only would he houses garages sheds cottages tell stories but the old time owners too

weirdelf

18 years ago

man, that what about a year ago

It was one time I should not have changed my poetry, remember Joe? I dumbed it down for him and don't even remember the original, should have kept it cheers, Jess

Barbara Writes

18 years ago

Jees

Smiles:) Barbara This was really great I enjoyed watching the peels of paint roll off like the stories of lives, love and death. Beautiful images. I have one suggestion at the end "he fixes are an argument between beauty is there was there" something seems to be missing feel certain you will make it work Other than this, it is one of you finer pieces.

DarkinAZ

18 years ago

The imperfection....

is what appeals. This is, my favorite of yours, ever. Nothing is perfect, and anything that appeared so, would give life to my suspicion. I think the loss of the original, is indeed the gain of this great write. Your friend, Mark

Janice Pearce

18 years ago