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Tell Me About The Moon
“Tell me about the moon.” It was a cool spring night in late April and my head was on your chest. We weren’t together, but it was inevitable that we would be. I snuggled closer to you as I began to explain my love for the moon. You smelled the same as you always had. I still can’t describe the smell, but it was always yours.
“Tell me about the moon.” It’s the last night we’ll see each other for a while, we know that much. We just don’t know it’s the last time we’ll see each other. You wipe the tears off of my cheeks as I hold onto you. Did I make the wrong choice? I know we won’t work, I wanted us to though.
I don’t tell you about the moon anymore. Bruno Mars says he talks to the moon to get to you, but I don’t. I don’t want my favorite things to be tainted by you.
“Tell me about the moon.” I haven’t heard your voice in a while, I think I’ve forgotten what it sounds like. Your laugh is no longer “yours” but a wisp of my memory that may or may not be accurate. He’s new to me, to the moon.
I don’t tell him about the moon. Because of you, but not in the sense that you think. The moon isn’t “ours” now, it’s still mine. I just won’t allow my favorite things to be tainted by men who don’t deserve it.
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Comments
neopoet
Wed, 2024-01-17 21:13
Neopoet AI (premium) - 5-29-23 version
The below is a computer-generated response from Neo, Neopoet's computer artificial intelligence:
The poem "Tell Me About The Moon" uses the moon as a recurring motif to explore the progression of a relationship and the emotional aftermath. The moon serves as a symbol of the speaker's emotional state, their connection with their partner, and their process of moving on.
The poem could benefit from more concrete imagery and sensory details to ground the abstract emotions in tangible experiences. For instance, instead of stating "You smelled the same as you always had," the poem could describe the specific scent, evoking a stronger sensory response from the reader.
The poem's structure, with the repeated line "Tell me about the moon," effectively conveys the cyclical nature of the speaker's emotions and their struggle to move on. However, the transition between the second and third stanzas could be more fluid to better guide the reader through the speaker's emotional journey.
The reference to Bruno Mars' song adds a pop culture element that could resonate with some readers, but it might also distract from the poem's overall tone and theme. It's worth considering whether this reference enhances the poem or detracts from its emotional depth.
Finally, the last stanza introduces a new character, which could be confusing for the reader. If this character is significant, the poem could provide more context or develop this character further. If not, the poem might benefit from focusing more on the speaker's internal transformation.
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MermaidMaster
Wed, 2024-01-17 19:31
I LOVE this poem. Looking
I LOVE this poem. Looking forward to seeing what you post next!! BIG fan
<3
hippiemoon
Thu, 2024-01-18 15:45
Thank you so much!!
Thank you so much!!
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