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Disillusion
The struggle out of misery,
the drama in violence
corrupted by mockery,
innocence stolen.
A captive heart,
souls drenched in tears,
wounded by time,
shattering dreams...
Patriotism!
Kill political will,
awaken heroism,
the outbreak of freedom.
Style / type:
Free verse
Editing stage:
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Comments
Ian.T
Mon, 2012-09-10 03:27
arja
A cry out,
A realisation of futility,
Then that dread.
Where there is only one conclusion.
I hope that there are other probability tracks that can be taken, life is hard.
This is the physical side where we have to overcome many things.
This is called learning and some lessons are cruel.
Then the inner self where these things are sorted into cause and effect.
I hope that the effect is of learning and not despair.
I think that there is more to this piece than you are telling, take care and walk with us,
Yours Ian.T
"Futility" or Despair" would fit the title
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
arja
Wed, 2014-11-26 23:49
Futility or Despair
I'm still unsure, though both conclude such..
judyanne
Wed, 2012-09-12 11:51
Patriotism!
'Patriotism! / Kill political will'
- imo patriotism is political will arja
apart from that discrepancy (lol imo ) of your poem, it is powerful enough to someone as I who have sat all of my life (except for a year I spent in Israel) in backwater towns and the most isolated capital city in the world – and known nought but internal political peace (of sorts)
but I love les miserables – and this is as good a verse as any in that show
i found the first stanza especially emotionally descriptive due to the great word usage
love judy xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
arja
Wed, 2014-11-26 23:52
Hi, Ms Judy! Sorry for the
Hi, Ms Judy! Sorry for the late reply.. I haven't watched les miserables yet.. this was written, having the Martial Law Era in my mind..
Rula
Wed, 2012-09-12 00:37
I loved this araj
because it describes pretty well everything around me these days .
I especially loved
A captive heart,
souls drenched in tears,
wounded by time,
shattering dreams'
great usage of language i believe and lots of emotions make it memorable enough for me.
Where are jess and Ron?? This work shop really misses them
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Rula
Mon, 2012-09-10 03:22
Oops
forgot to say , it indeed deserves a title and a memorable one :) :)
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arja
Wed, 2014-11-26 23:55
Hi, Rula! I know this has
Hi, Rula! I know this has been written years ago (hope my reply still reaches you), but until now I think..I feel that..I actually couldn't think of a befitting title to it yet..
Esker
Tue, 2012-09-11 07:18
here is true liberty
of the discussions and political lessons of late
finally a poem with the true value from the heart
of the "people"
Politics advises gathers and smooths
the ache that grows
the false dawn on long nights
dictatorships move action
through conflict threat and force
funded by blood
"awaken heroism
the outbreak of freedom"
in a world rife with bullies
the heros are caught
they are sleeping waiting
this poem makes me feel
hope that we as a humanity
have not forgotten that as
individuals we have the
choice still to be free
not only for us but for
each other...
that our humanity has not
ebbed away
This poem is wonderful
spoken like a true poet
Thank You
arja
Wed, 2014-11-26 23:57
Thank you Sir!
As always, I appreciate your comments..
Barbara Writes
Wed, 2014-11-26 03:58
Aja
I can't relate as politic brings much controversy and very little freedom. You do or die and die doing. Either way you look at it justice had been abyss.. Another good poem.
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arja
Wed, 2014-11-26 23:57
Thank you Ms Barbara! ;)
Thank you Ms Barbara! ;)