Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Aching
I miss her in the way that sometimes people say
"Covid is over"
I mean, we're all acting like its over
But its still everywhere
In the form of her things around my house
She used to take my breath away
And now its taken away by muffled sobs
I dont think ill ever shake this aching in my heart
I have been know to burn things after a breakup
That I know they dont want back
The speaker quietly plays music as I stare into the flames
"All the sadness all the rage, throw it on the fire"
"You keep saying the past is not dead
just stop and smell the smoke"
This is basically a form of self torture
That I impose upon myself
The thing is,
I still cant do it
I dont know if I ever will
But a part of me dreads seeing her things
Eventually, no matter how hard I try to hide it
Push it in a dark corner
I dont think ill ever shake this aching in my heart
Ill miss her like the plauge
Its over
And its all over
My house, in the form of little trinkets
A copy of "crash"
A pair of shorts that I borrowed
An old dried out bouquet of flowers
That I'd hoped i would keep forever
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction):
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
Geezer
Mon, 2022-09-26 09:12
Hey Marge...
I've missed you.
I was a little worried that the "bug" may have gotten you.
You have written a bittersweet poem and I imagine that
this has what kept you away, not a physical sickness,
but a sickness of loss, a piece of you gone. I am so sorry.
Is your apostrophe key broken?
I notice that you have used only a single one.
Is there a reason for that?
The only other thing that I notice is that you have
a typo in the way that you have spelled plague.
Nice work for the first one in a while.
Don't make me wait too long for a new one!
~ Geez.
.
There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.