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Inheritance
In the end
gold and silver will not last
but true knowledge
inherited by the living
will shine in glory
beyond this mortal life.
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage:
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Comments
Rula
Thu, 2016-03-03 15:28
wise words brother
I don't think you need the commas as it reads more as one continuous thought.
Just how I read it.
❤❤❤❤❤❤
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alidzain
Thu, 2016-03-03 21:07
Salam, Rula
Thanks for the visit, read and comment.
Alid
Roscoe Lane
Fri, 2016-03-04 00:27
How very,
How very true, nice piece. Regards Roscoe....
Roscoe Llane,
Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.
alidzain
Fri, 2016-03-04 12:15
Thanks Roscoe
Its good to hear from you again.
Alid