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You are so intimate.......inspired by....

You are so intimate.......inspired by you.
You are so intimate
that's what I thought

as I stepped forward
my chest seemed to be caught
in the lengthy nails
I imagined to be,
too true
yes that's true,

then side twists of my body
upon yours curvaceous
jerked me off
as you tried to too,

but sudden transformation of a reality,
to a dream that now say you,
made me go down the corridors
naked to scream

foul play upon my nerves
I did display,
how could you place
my thoughts in disarray
to calm me down to look like a fool
imagining in my dreams
Sweety twas really you!

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

I really thought this piece shows some potential, I enjoyed the journey it needs a little work but I know how you like to keep your pieces as is, usually lol If you would like some crit I would be happy to provide some for you

nice to read you again

love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

all your edits on my works
are like cake icings
and all love it

thanks kindly do
a half baked poet I am ...
you know that too
born poet
no knowledge

loved

author comment

This was not entirely clear throughout. But I don't think it would take any effort to clarify.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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