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Wow !What Neighbours

Submitted by loved on Sun, 2012-03-18 07:34

We have loveliest of neighbours
they keep daggers hidden
beneath the bushes
and
hope to strike,
is if unknowingly
they strive to thieve
and
We try to brief
do not be so greedy
they are otherwise nice,
but they know not,
what they do...

how I wish our father
since gone away knew
some are the scum today,
out to bring harm all your way
what damn associates
did you say?
they alone now do betray.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Candlewitch

Mon, 2012-03-26 12:03

Candlewitch's picture
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I can appreciate what you have written here. I have great neighbors on our right side. We exchange baked goods and chat often. On the left we have disorderly and loud people who have no consideration for anyone.

always, Cat

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loved

Sun, 2012-03-18 14:03

loved's picture

rude neighbours
uncouth ..

loved

author comment

Willy

Sun, 2012-03-18 19:23

Willy's picture

Dear Loved,

There is this very visible thread of irony in your piece: lovely Neighbours to begin with but by the end they were betrayers.............but if the truth be told the neighbourly bond that once existed (where you virtually looked out for your neighbour; where his children respected you and you could discipline them with no fear) is gone.....it is more like i just happen to be living near you and that's it; its more like overt exhibitions of materialism and foolish pride........delinquency, pollution...........!

Always Willy

loved

Sun, 2012-03-18 22:37

loved's picture

Wonderful

evaluation yours,
the truth is out
and
we must accept change,
as of now
and
not of the yester-years when a neighbor, was,
as you rightly put across,
irony is the consequence..
Thank you Willy,
for passing by
it gives me strength

loved

author comment

scribbler

Sun, 2012-03-18 22:46

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Did you mean to say "mean AS if......" in L-5?
Yes a bad neighbor can be a real pain. I guess Frost was right in saying good fences make good neighbors lol......stan

loved

Sun, 2012-03-18 22:52

loved's picture

Thanks Stan
you are the only solid ,
bold i mean , (as in meant)
man

loved

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