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Would gnomes succumb to drones?

a pebble in the pond caused ripples
a stone hurled at a tree killed a bird
a catapult made an enemy of a friend
soon a border turned friends into foes

can we turn the tide back to ripples?
yes only if we want to, but don't seem to

the ism of isms is egoism
peace is torn into pieces
life is cheaper than a dime
love getting lost in crime

in a generation of clones and drones
would the world be shy of gnomes?

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
Editing stage: 

Comments

life is cheaper than a dime...
nice 1..
now all understand

deleted

raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

I think its about gnomes- those elfy like creatures or that new computer package (which I don't really understand what it is).. I have to start there because not getting your intent I can't piece the rest of the poem together..

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

the first part is about how friends became enemies [genesis of war]
next part is about what keeps fueling the wars and the effect
the concluding part is about artificial intelligence [drones] entering the fray and if gnomes the legendary dwarf like creatures would be able top preserve treasures of the earth which is considered to be what they are supposed to do

don't know if it answers your question

thanks for the read
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raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

but I think we all expect too much from readers to read our minds within the structure of a poem.
Most of us are guilty of that. But when we read the great poets that move us, that inspire us, the basic narrative, intent, or soul of the poem is crystal clear. This is not the "meaning", which often has to expand into a purely poetic polemic.
We need to get what you stated in the comments, you had to explain it to me in simple prose. I think the best craft is when you get your idea across IN the poem. So my suggestion is not to be afraid of being to simplistic, we can always add devises to make the poem more complex. But get the basic soul of the poem understood, or perceived, first.
Poetry is taught today within the framework of abstraction which has caused its decline. People are afraid of it because they don't understand it. Poets are taught to hide the meaning at the risk of being too simple. BS! Take any great modern poem...Stopping in the woods" by Frost. It has so many inferences and meanings, but any reader will know what the poem is about.

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

Thanks Eumolpus for sharing your thoughts...noted that my poem fell much below your expectations....having said that i feel it is not fair to compare my weak poetic attempts with the legends [Frost]...

regards....

raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

Sorry you felt I was comparing you to one of the greats. It was just used as an example of how the greats make a poem both comprehensible and abstract at the same time. We are each our own individual voices, but to share our poetry I believe we must not be so vague as to distance the reader from the poem. This is the crises of modern poetry, why it has fallen to the least practiced art in the modern world. Poems are too often written as crossword puzzles and mazes. I believe our goal as modern poets is to find that fine line between over simplicity, cliche and triteness with being overly philosophical, vague and abstract.
Most of my poems fall under expectations to me. That's ok. That's the same for all artists, and what it means to be an artist. The process of improvement never ends.

..

Eumolpus
I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing
than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance
ee cummings

Thanks for emphasizing your views which is appreciated...Yes..i agree that "process of improvements never ends"...i very strongly subscribe to that and keep trying to improve as much as possible for an amateur like me whose mother tongue is not English...and not from the Arts stream...

Once again appreciate your inputs and thoughts...

best regards...

raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

Thanks MarkL for the reading and an expressive comment.
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raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment
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