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I'm seriously worried now.

My daughter's having a baby
but I'm far from the hospital
and the hours are dragging by
and there's no news.

What if she has died,
but no one wants to tell me
in case I go overboard?
What if the baby has died?
What if the baby has a serious problem,
mental or physical,
meaning a life of care and worry for my daughter?
Why doesn't someone keep me informed?

I'm going to phone my wife.

I've called her.

She says everything's O.K,
just taking its time.
This is my daughter's first baby,
and apparently she's in no rush
to enter our world.
Who can blame her?

Meanwhile, I smoke and drink coke,
and sleep very little
and my wife tries to rest
in the probably not-very-comfy waiting room,
and the battery's running out on her cell-phone,
so she may not be able to contact me later
if something happens.


I'll keep you all informed
(all five of you) .

Editing stage: 


ask a doctor's help

the child due
is just add on to
7.5 billion

including you
why worry

you need many
to read u

okay I will do

I suppose one of the problems about having a reasonably good imagination is that it's very easy to imagine the worst as well as the best. I only think of such awful possibilities briefly, but long enough to be able to write a would-be poem about them. But I can't accept that seeing the baby as just a statistic is much help. To me, she is obviously unique even among so many millions. As for neurosis I've never really understood what that means, but I've probably got it. I seem to have had just about every mental problem under the sun at some point. By the way I would perhaps have worried even more if I had been there in the waiting room instead of a four-hour drive away.
Best wishes,

author comment

on a date

I was born on May 20th 1953. Why do you ask?
Best wishes,

author comment

all's well that ends well
and ur anxiety was
only temporary
the birth day etc was for my study
as to why do u so much worry
time of birth is also very important;
now relax enjoy
don't worry

this over a couple of times, I thought that maybe this might benefit from a little paring of your lines.
I would... leave some words out.

My take: My daughter's having a baby
I'm far from the hospital
The hours are dragging by
There's no news

What if she has died,
and no one wants to tell me?
In case I go overboard
Maybe the baby has died

I don't want to write the whole thing over for you, because I think you can see for yourself,
what you might do; from just this little I have showed you. maybe I'm all wet, but I think it might be more of an urgent sound to it. ~ Gee

Our Chatroom is open 24/7 Feel free to use it for
keeping in touch We have poets around the world and it is fun
to have real-time conversations with those that are up
all night or on the other side of the world.

I'm not sure about this. You seem to have almost wiped out punctuation, which I consider to be important. And why cut out some of the frantic questions? Surely they increase the intensity of the impression of worrying. Anyway , I'll have to come back to it after a few days to see if I can notice what's wrong.
Best wishes and thanks,
P.S. Both my daughter and her baby are fine. The latter has incredibly thick, long hair! Just on her head I mean.

author comment

was not to cut any of the questions or to wipe out the punctuation, but to shorten them to give more of an urgency to the whole thing.
Congratulations on becoming a new grampa! It's one of the best feelings in the world and I'm sure that you will find that she is the most beautiful little girl in the world, [ even if the hair was all over her body! ] ~ Gee

Our Chatroom is open 24/7 Feel free to use it for
keeping in touch We have poets around the world and it is fun
to have real-time conversations with those that are up
all night or on the other side of the world.

in the light of your suggestions. Thanks for congratulations on grandchild. Everyone is telling me what a wonderful feeling it will be to hold her in my arms, but I'm afraid that won't happen for another week or so.
Best wishes,

author comment

One does sense the anxiety, anguish of the situation. Unfortunately generally one tends to fear the worst when one goes into the anxiety syndrome. How about having a go at another poem in a positive upbeat mood? something like "welcome to our world" that would perhaps uplift and cheer you up while you are in the "wait & watch" mode...

best wishes grandpa-in-wait,

raj (sublime_ocean)

I am no longer a grandfather-in-wait and everything went well in the end but I take your point. In reality I only felt such anxiety briefly, but long enough to write an attempted poem. Tonight I'll post another poem I wrote when the baby was born, welcoming her to this world as you put it, but I'm afraid it isn't wholly optimistic by any means. Many thanks for your suggestion.
Best wishes,

author comment

Congratulations! Good to know you are a grandfather now. Enjoy the feelings and emotions which go with it.


raj (sublime_ocean)

I've only seen photos and listened to my wife's descriptions so far, but the sense of renewed hope and purpose in life is gradually sinking in. Even if I could only help my grandchild to learn a bit of English I would be doing something very useful, as a good knowledge of the language of Shakespeare (and Melville) is vital in Spain these days. And of course there's just the wonder of a new life having been created, clearly a much more important thing than all my poems or even all Shakespeare's poems (not that I'm comparing the two of us). So yes, I think I am enjoying the emotions, as you recommend in your kind comment.
Best wishes,

author comment

It is no wonder that you find the arrival of your grandchild more important than your poems..however it would be appropriate to say that he/she is a wonderful poem which you have been blessed with and it would be wonderful to absorb while you assimilate the unique experience ...

Regards and best wishes...

raj (sublime_ocean)

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