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WOMAN.

Be kind to woman
that we never leave
from the cradle
to the grave
will lay us down
to sleep
because of her
we breathe.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

but there seems to be a break in the middle
that no matter how I read it, it does not seem that there is a way
to make the transition from the line; "the cradle to the grave" to
"will lay us down to sleep". I'm sure that you had something in mind,
but it has been lost. ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

you do need a rethink
of your black and blue ink

who agree.

*hugs, Cat

*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Thanks Cat.

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