Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

WISE COUNSEL

When in dilemma, seek counsel
From your peers, my friend
You hear them say all sorts of things
I will not agree, if I were you
No one tries that with me
Real pepper, is what I will show
In return, you pull down the roof
And drag naked fire to light the sea

When you seek a worthy counsel
From old men or women
You hear them tell their stories
When men were men, and women
Won by those who deserved them
They tell you tales of daring exploits
Then leave you to make your mind
From the secret keys they embedded

Not all young ones ask you to kill
Some warn of danger in the wrong
Not all the elders talk in parables
Some say things and mock their grey hairs
When you need counsel of the wise
Pay attention to the old and young
Then take an expedition into the self
Heed the caution of the still small voice

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

Gorgeous use of language profoundly written,

Yet still, you and Paul are two poets who take themselves and their task so seriously you take the fun out of it. I would really like to see more humorous poetry from both of you.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

jokes and seriousness. Thank you for the tip, I will give a try on something humorous, best wishes

tr

A rekindled faith - Dancing in the Light

author comment

then it is because you post too much, you could use your limited online time to edit your poems and give critique to others.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Lately, I see workshop pieces are given priority and I told myself it time to critique others, thanks and best wishes.

tr

A rekindled faith - Dancing in the Light

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.