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White Sails

White Sails
gleaming in the sun
slow motion rider
your journey has just begun

The breaking waves upon the wall
miniature spouts of whales to recall

A freighter out on the horizon
where is it bound
sandpipers scurry as they dodge the waves

The seagulls cry and shatter the calm
still they are a part of this glorious song

something is missing in all of this beauty
that something and someone is you

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
written while visiting. I cannot say who I was missing at the time my brother(now deceased) as I watched from his porch I could see the bay meet the river then meet the ocean
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

You said not so long ago how you love the ocean, and it is so clear to see in this beautiful poem in all the imagery in all its glory. Beautifully done.

Thank you...Teddy

thank you. yes I love the ocean in fact the title of my first book is the lady is an ocean

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author comment

Dear lynn, such a lovely poem. The imagery is beautiful, the title perfect. I love it. I also love the sea. Below, a few suggestions for neater verses, to TorT.

Seagulls cry and shatter the calm
still they're part of this glorious song

something is missing in all of this beauty,
I know 'tis you.

(that something and someone is you)

Hope you don't mind, all the best, Gracy

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

thank you for the suggestions
I cheated this poem is already in print it being summer I thought it appropriate

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author comment

You can't go wrong with ocean and song. I feel as if I have read this before.
Perhaps it the images you paint with your words. All things I love.

Very nice.
Sue

Not that anyone asked but my vote is no on the 'tis. Sorry Gracy.

you may very well have see above for explanation thank you for reading

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author comment

Thanks for pulling this poem out of print...that's why we could read it...

i would like to point out that there are two "are"s in the line "still they're are a part of this glorious song"...is it delibeate or through oversight?

be well..

raj (sublime_ocean)

thanks for catching that and for the read will make repairs now

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author comment
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