Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

When folks have all the time

Submitted by loved on Wed, 2014-05-07 01:12

When folks have all the time

what are just three lines
they call it a senyru
that's no crime

they test patience
comparing with red wine
and sublime
like my visions across the oceans

I see a senyru coming
but then I promised to remain
within my own domain
and raj I can't dare annoy
nor with Ian's ideology toy
but oh boy
Barbara has forgotten me

come lets go to sea
and watch the demise of a setting sun
which has a right to rise as a reborn one
elsewhere

that's no surprise
friend rise
put a bikini on
or drop it
no one will see
all will be too busy
composing senyorary

loved

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

raj

Wed, 2014-05-07 01:48

I am not annoyed as you seem to think. Everyone I believe has different perceptions and I have no issues about it....

Regards,

raj (sublime_ocean)

loved

Wed, 2014-05-07 04:08

loved's picture

stress
which at times does distress
the other guys were enjoying it
so I just joined in
that's all
glad you came in

the ocean is sublime
and raj my friend is fine

he loves gin and lime ..
maybe,
may be not
but
I only love red wine
from hands divine
scotch would be fine
if payment is not mine

potato pockets
you and school guys know

loved

author comment

emeka ozurumba

Wed, 2014-05-07 05:16

emeka ozurumba's picture

loved you are a music maker, and your lyres deepen a conquest for intuition

loved

Thu, 2014-05-08 01:35

loved's picture

such musical words for loved
ur so sweet

loved

author comment

Barbara Writes

Wed, 2014-05-07 17:03

Barbara Writes's picture
Volunteer badge

a musical poem you have written. I havent forgotten you.

*Collaborative Poetry Workshop* American Version of Japanese Poetry ~ Renga ~ Haiku, Senyru, Tanka.

Neopoet Community

loved

Thu, 2014-05-08 02:54

loved's picture

and I know tis difficult to forget Loved
by most
on another site over 900 read me daily
and expect a new one every day
I can't disappoint them

but any one else may

loved

author comment

Ian.T

Wed, 2014-05-07 18:52

Ian.T's picture
Volunteer badge

I tried the Bikini but looked such a fool I ran into the forest and cried tears for all those that never try something new.
Loved no one is forgotten here or after here, your words and thoughts are eternal, so best think only the best of all things.
I have a few more writes to do so will leave you for a while, but as there is only Now I can never leave you once we have met here lol, Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.