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weaver
silk wool sari thread
blind mares' mane
egret feather magpie song currawong
dazzled- close your eyes -
still weaving
ships' rope jute golden baling twine
mud damp reeds scented dried
warp and weft weft and warp
single ribbon snake skin slides
unanchored
by the loom
Review Request (Intensity):
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Last few words:
Knocked this poem up following a conversation with a friend about lives - the weaving of others into our own internal framework
Editing stage:
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Comments
Roscoe Lane
Sun, 2018-09-02 01:48
I like,
I like this a lot, and can picture what your saying with words. Regards Roscoe... A heartfelt welcome to Neopoet,,
Roscoe Llane,
Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.
IRiz
Tue, 2018-09-04 10:37
interesting poem, it is too
interesting poem, it is too cryptic to my taste
open up a little more
IRiz
gregwa8
Wed, 2018-09-05 23:45
I enjoyed the rhythm and
I enjoyed the rhythm and imagery in this. nice!
Sparrow
Thu, 2018-09-06 04:01
Jaspa
Just to read once, then again to fill in the in between the lines.
As if you are being lazy, but the picture was good, could be the weaver of life you are talking about but we still have to fill in the bits..
Welcome back to Neopoet, Stay with us a while I want to read your filling in poem.. Yours Ian .
.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti