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visibility

What do you see when you look at me?
Do you see that I am magical and beautiful?
How quickly do you see my imperfections, flaws, and scars?
The ones on my skin, below the surface
my heart has bandages and stitches.
What do you see when you look at me?
The epitome of hope and resiliency
Are you evaluating and analyzing how I am a risk, asset, or liability?
Are you waiting for an opportunity to call out my next mistake?
Do you see my potential, my wonders, my victories, my complexities?
Do you see concrete walls, broken glass, accessible windows, unlocked doors, open arms, open heart?
What do you see when you look at me?
Do you see my beautiful mess, my organized systems breaking down? A bumpy, confusing, fragile renewal to say the least.
Do you see my needs, my wants, my desire to be desired?
My longing for intimacy, my yearning for space, my craving to take on more, and my fantasy to let it all go?
Have you calculated the ROI of hanging out with me? Do the benefits outweigh the costs?
Do you see I am one month behind and two steps ahead?
I am operating beyond the physical
Count the planes, there are seven, not the drops of water.
Do you see the force field of protection?
Do you see that I see you on my radar?
Now, let's question this objection and attraction.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage: 

Comments

Firstly a great welcome to Neopoet, we are a working environment for learning and teaching.
Learning as in listening, (To comments made on your words)
Teaching as in giving (Writing and Streaming poems and commenting on others works)
Please ask if you ever need help on site..
This piece is a laid out self analysis, many things pass by your vision each day, it is what you do with those things and how you have been taught to reflect on the effect they have on you.
I always look inward so a lot of the things you seem to have mean nothing to me a dreamer and seeker of all things.
Take care and enjoy your stay with us,
Yours as always Ian.. (Sparrow -- Yenti )

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Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

Thank you, Ian, Sparrow, and Yenti for the warm welcome! I appreciate the Neopoet's learning philosophy and environment. In addition, I appreciate the feedback on the poem, it is a rough draft and I wanted to get the large concepts out of my head. My next step is to make it a bit more abstract and more emotional for dramatic effect.

author comment

as a narrative and a good theme. I am pleased to greet you and welcome you to Neopoet.
I hope that you will enjoy the site as much as I do and take advantage of the workshops that we offer and find a home here at Neo. If you have any questions about anything here, you just ask and myself or someone will try to answer them. Again, welcome to Neopoet! ~ Geezer.
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There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thank you, Geezer. I appreciate the information on the premium membership. I will see how the regular membership suits me and then go from there. Take good care.

author comment
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