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Vantage Point

Submitted by raj on Tue, 2018-05-29 14:04

I did everything, except tying my shoe laces
with one shoe in future, other in the present
my feet won't need them, when I leap ahead
but laces shall tie me, to footprints that fade

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 
Editing - rough draft

Comments

Jackweb

Tue, 2018-05-29 14:41

Jackweb's picture

Yeah, one thing is certain in the future, and that is the time we all shall have our individual exit in life. The third line and the last line pictured when a dead man lie prostrate inside the coffin and rest in grave.
When we were alive we tried our best to put the best cloth ever, and wear expensive shoes... but whenever death hits us another person had to dress us up in especially in the morgue -for the last time.

"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".

~Jackweb

raj

Tue, 2018-05-29 14:41

for taking the time to read, analyze the poem by reading between the lines and sharing your perspective.
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raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

Jackweb

Tue, 2018-05-29 14:47

Jackweb's picture

This is what i thought the poem was saying...'Our final exit' I believe the author must have his own original intent of the poem.

"By virtue of creativity, my literary genre is poetry".

~Jackweb

raj

Tue, 2018-05-29 14:53

until I read perceptions of others who may visit this page...i can tell you that there can be multiple perceptions ...yours is one of them quite close and in sync with the theme..

Thanks for visiting again..
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raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

raj

Tue, 2018-05-29 15:38

Thanks for taking time to read and share with me your perception of between the lines message...As mentioned to Jack in my reply to his comment above different people perceive different things from the Vantage Point....I liked how you analyzed it in your own way..that's the fun of writing in abstract...isn't it?

Thanks again..
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raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment

Rula

Wed, 2018-05-30 02:10

Rula's picture
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for me this is a pure call to enjoy the present moment.
No need to look back or think about the future.
I really like the shoe /lace metaphor, you've employ effectively in this short evoking thought.

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

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raj

Wed, 2018-05-30 05:08

Thanks Rula for taking time in your busy month of Ramadan to read and comment. Good to know you liked it..
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raj (sublime_ocean)

author comment
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