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Valkyrie...

Lightning flashed across my midnight sky
A Valkyrie with flowing hair
My heart was pounding, I blinked my eye
But no, she still was there

She took possession of my soul
I knew I was lost right then
What did she want, what was her goal?
It was beyond my mortal ken

I was to ride her windy horse
This puny human, a wreck of a man
I asked her why, she said, of course
“It is because you can”

I doubted I would stay on board
the horse bucked, but I clung to her back
The future is what we rode toward
Around us lightning cracked

We rode and rode, a never-ending trail
Our steed twisted and I stuck
I heard the fates scream and wail
“Keep riding, she's your luck”

Some paths taken, were all wrong
Many times we lost the track
But though the trail has been so long
I still look fondly back

The path is so much smoother now
and we ride slower, this is true
I must let you know somehow
I was saved because of you

You're still my Valkyrie, my love
I still ride upon your windy horse
I thank the gods that sent you from above
I love you, yes, of course!

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
Our twenty-fourth wedding anniversary is coming up on the sixteenth of Sept. This is a poem to let her know that I still love riding with her.
Editing stage: 

Comments

I am sure she will love it...

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

but straight from my heart. Thanks, ~ Gee

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author comment

But I think she'll be happier if you 'found yourself then' instead of being 'lost' (stanza 2/line 2)
Guess you need to ask her :)

❤❤❤❤❤❤

Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words
........Robert Frost☺

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like I said it. I never intended to stick around and she knew it. Then I saw her as the Valkyrie and it was all over! Married twenty-four years, but together for thirty. Thanks, Rula! ~ Gee

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author comment

For some reason, I tend to think that a Valkyrie is a winged lady warrior like Hawkwoman in the justice league but i might be wrong, of course. LOL. Your version is just as beautiful. kudos to you, man!

Alid

a Valkyrie is a winged lady warrior! My wife was quite the scrapper during her day. She still has that spirit, although she doesn't act as rashly as in her youth. These days, she just lets you know when she has her sword in hand by vocalizing. None the less, when she does, you feel her power. I love my Valkyrie dearly! ~ Geezer

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author comment

That we could all have a Valkyrie to tend us so, beautifully written and a tribute to those that are at your side.
Those that life's journey is made a joy,
Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Many times I write a poem and then after a while, it is pushed to the back of my mind as I move on to other subjects. It is so nice to have someone comment on one and bring it back so that I can take a fresh look at it
and remember the mood it was written in. I believe that my Valkyrie has saved me many times, because I would not risk her wrath in doing something I know she would not approve of. She has always tended my needs and looked after me. I truly love my Valkyrie! ~ Gee

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Critique or comment today!

author comment

Alid, brought your piece to my notice, maybe it is for a reason it is here again,
Your poetry especially this piece tell grand stories of places we would love to go and things we would love to see.
I know we play at the dark things like Killer etc: but our love of all things is there always, thank you for your words,
Yours Ian.T

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

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