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Sugar Baby

Sugar baby
plaything for daddy
showers her in money
she's his honey

Fulfills her lifestyle
widens his smile
hugs and kisses
never his mrs.

He's paying her college fees
she's often on her knees
has a child to feed
gives her what she needs

Is it prostitution?
or business transaction
Is either getting hurt?
or is it all just sport

Sugar is very nice
to life it adds spice
but too much can be bad for you
I hope their actions they don't rue

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Editing stage: 

Comments

and the second worst thing is you don't know you have them.
The worst thing is you write trite silly poetry.
Sorry, that's what I see.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

thanks again Jess

author comment

The poem has meaning and value (but I still think you have unresolved issues)

The real problem with this poem is the double spacing. Edit it and I promise it will read a lot better.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

I have underestimated you, sueb. You are a brave poet. I apologise. I really have been off my game recently.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
https://www.neopoet.com/workshop/rhythm-and-meter-poetry

Hi Jess issues are issues poems are poems i appreciate all your comments and reading have a good day x

author comment
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