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Streams of silver sparkle
in a moonlit sky.
The darkness wraps itself
around me like a blanket
on a cold Winter's night.
My soul is at peace
and I am safe
from another day.
I can dream and feel
no pain.


Editing stage: 


cuts right through in this one Geremia!
I can sit down and see these stars
and feel the cold

hear the voice you are writing with

Thank You!

This really flows through smoothly and creates the imagery & mood.


raj (sublime_ocean)

Thank you, Raj and Steven, I wasn't sure I would keep this one and intended to unpublish it . I did want to create a feeling. with special imagery. The words dpn't come to me so easily anymore


author comment

the lines are kick ass.....everyone sees the sky the stars..
someone describing them like this makes them new again
that a a falling star..
every fall..every..winter..spring..summer..night they were all
different..will be different...but we see..
look up and feel it..and to have others standing there
and they dont say..hey this is that..that is this..
you just look up and go...
"Streams of silver sparkle in a moonlit sky."
and that is what knocks me back in that one..
its like a cool line!

"The darkness wraps itself around me like a blanket"

powerful lines Geremia

"I can dream and feel no pain"
complete opposite from a lot
people have nightmares
and pain filled vividness
wake in character like

but the concept of dreams
to not feel pain

thats true sailing
one must feel this
not just out of the blue
write it up..

this is living.
this is feeling
pushing it..

This Poetry rolls
all on its own
and thats Poetry

Thank You Geremia!

Poetry is, for me. what is truth,

thanks,, Steven

author comment
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