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The Standoff

Submitted by Depressed 1 on Sun, 2022-12-04 21:53

You are not far away as the crow flies

I will be back with you by sunrise

The rain it starts to pour heavy down

As the blood soaks into the ground

As it slowly seeps into the soft dirt

I pray for less, but I get more hurt

I am a wanted man in this town

So I fire off just one more round

I have never been a violent man

The Police just do not understand

I feel a sting as it enters my mind

Hurt more when you left me behind

I know that they will lay me low

As through my eyes blood flows

As they lay me six in the ground

To the earth, I am forever bound

There beside my grave, she lays

With flowers upon her grave

She lays beside me forever more

Will find peace we never found before

Review Request (Intensity):

Please use care (this is a sensitive subject for me, do not critique harshly)

Editing stage:

Editing - polished draft

Content level:

Not Explicit Content

Comments

Kristen H.

Sun, 2022-12-04 22:10

This...

This is beautifully written.

Depressed 1

Sun, 2022-12-04 23:00

Thanks

Thanks Kristen

https://www.artofelpaso.com/

author comment

Geezer

Mon, 2022-12-05 09:46

My only suggestion is...

to change the [Will] to [We'll]. ~ Geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Depressed 1

Tue, 2022-12-06 01:37