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A soldier’s battle

A soldier’s battle

The distant jungles abandoned
it gives me a virtual image of a soldier
across the thick jungles
of a place called Vietnam.
The youth then needs you most
the tenderness
since replaced with anger and wrath
against the enemy
hiding behind the tree...

Jungles are a dangerous place to be
as one doesn't know
a reptile, a snake or the bullet of an enemy
may take one’s life just for the asking

but at that point of time
no soldier knows where is he,
he lurks behind the jungle trees,
in a passion more than love
more hatred for the enemy,

he has abandoned all hopes
of being once again a loving family

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Editing stage: 

Comments

first time I read yourmore serious poem. Not bad. Let's see what others have to say.

Alid

discouragingly
negative
you perhaps could be more liberal
by saying
quite good etc
rethink you set a negative tone
sorry Alid

author comment

to me, not bad and quite good means the same. okay, okay, I get it, one of us thinks one way and the other thinks another way. To each his own view. Fine, its quite good. There I've said it. Funny thing is, when I first started out writing english poetry in my younger days, I'll be happy even if one says its "not bad". I mean its better than "horrible" and "ridiculous" that I keep getting.

Alid

but read the positive comments
Raj _sublime gives
see below before i thank him so

thanks go to you also
all the way
its years since i composed poetry
by the way
and not since just yesterday

author comment

You have captured nicely the Vietnam war and what the soldiers had to endure with.

Regards,..

raj (sublime_ocean)

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