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Slayer

Slayer

Blood is dark by pale moonlight
and pours without control
like sacrificial rain of night
draining from a soul

air is heavy, foul with death,
aching for a breeze
silence hangs like dragon breath
corrupted by disease

razor steel has done its deed
another whore lies dead
chuckle as you watch her bleed
your ego must be fed

foggy dawn will soon arrive
the carcass will be found
something that was once alive
strewn upon the ground

you didn’t even know her name
in truth, it matters not,
only that you cleansed her shame
with righteous anger hot

London sleeps, you slip away,
never looking back
free to kill another day
God bless you, brother Jack

C. Lon R. Bruso

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
This is my third poem about Jack the Ripper, and I'm beginning to feel an affinity for the character! In a literary sense, of course! LOL!!
Editing stage: 

Comments

Jack likely has been the inspiration for a Lot of dark poetry but it's also likely that few have captured him better than you just did.......stan PS why not turn 180 and enter the May contest which deals with humor?

Enter the contest.
The poem is incredible.

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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You have succeeded in disturbing me deeply.
Congratulations.
I can't even accredit this with irony.

cheers,
Jess
A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'
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A great write and is topping Killer, Nevermore and Digit, I wonder if you can join in their sprees, this piece indicates that the four of them would make Poe weep.
Great to read you here again, Yours Ian

.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti

For taking the time to read this, leave me excellent feedback, and understanding my "dark" side!

author comment

Photography more the literary power lent us the Toxic view of the world.
Pliny the Elder died giving his correspondent views..Think it was Pliny..
No photos...No sketchs or engravings...Imaginations runs on the imagery..
Then photos....congestion...The Gross...for Gruesome! Shocking!..
titillating!! Weight of impact!....tabloid fever.....Dark Passenger..Wolf..
Crow....Shadow...Twin Self....Many...Adoption of theme in battle...etc
Joseph Conrad and others....limlitless.....He was never caught we the imagination
can feed into whom he may have been....We have The Mad Trapper far up
north a few years later...Countless killers...Including Williams...And the women
whom were on their bent!..But its not so much this and other works about the
person....I think...But about this side of humanity and human nature that
can go out and come back...just like that....

Hatred and rage are the worst things.....hating your family for a disability per say.
or they didnt by u the car....thats motive for bad ju ju....Jack....we dont know..
he bought them grapes..he had a coach...driver..he was no slouch no equal to
people working then...or you got bullied for being different..

Excellent Poem....Jack as a working man...and the mention of Ego..
which gives the trait of motive ..because without ego there are many many more..

Thank You ...

You know how this subject fascinates me. This is incredible

Chrys
Let your mercy spill on all these burning hearts in hell(Leonard Cohen)

Your comments and input have boosted my spirits immensely! Thank you both for being here!

author comment

This is one hell of a poem disturbing and it moves us whether we like it or not you have always had the quill of a bard ... well done and what a pleasure to read I loved your 'dark' side.

love to you both Jayne xox

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

nice flow...good rhyme sequence..great theme focusing on current scenarios...very crisp nd appealing..

Regards,

raj (sublime_ocean)

Your kind words and reviews bring happiness to an old poet's soul and heart! Much appreciated!

author comment

Another great write Lonnie. Always a pleasure to read your poems. :)

Love Mand xxxx

It's nice to get a word or three from you and greatly appreciated!

author comment
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