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Shy of the Tiger

I reckon we recognise
and appreciate deeply
the freedom
of a bad deed
not exacted upon us
as it goes against
the very grain
of our experience.
some people hear
about the terrible things
we know of.
they don't hear it from us
and can't know it
like we do
thank the stars

who hears us?
those that do
become miraculous
in the cold shadow
of a sharp
and shapely world.
I reckon that
glow of interest
could gracefully pass me by
had I not earlier
been drowned
in the full capability
of Man's obligatory
progressive stains.
the invented
need to occupy success
against all other comers'
as is drummed in
from the early days.
you can do anything!
fuck anyone else
you can do anything!
you better do something
you can do anything!
but you can't do that.

when I can't commune,
instead I consume
and I like to bite hard
on the gristle
and read auguries
in the spat out remains
to divine contrived meaning
from the non conversation
of a blank stare
delivered yet again
on a trial basis.

I want to slap that face
and kiss it!
- there in lies the trouble

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 


I like this style of writing

has an extemporaneous feel to it; unforced,
a pleasing sense of language..(let's face it, some people/writers scrape in down a cheese grater.

and some keen-eyed observations of the human condition

I especially like the imagery in the last paragraph (stanza) and the closing lines

that's it for now



"Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law.
Modern morality and manners suppress all natural instincts, keep people ignorant of the facts of nature and make them fighting drunk on bogey tales.
Ordinary morality is only for ordinary people."

Though I feel sure your intent was of larger scope.

Like Al, I very much like your style, you manage through a certain frivolity of wordplay to impart profound ideas without falling into the traps of ponderousity (sic?), proselytising or self-importance.

Sorry, got nothing to crit or suggest here.

A new workshop on the most important element of poetry-
'Rhythm and Meter in Poetry'

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