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THE SHUNNING edit
THE SHUNNING
I hope to stay another day
or two or more
as far as the years allow
and when I'm gone
I wonder who will remember
my rhymes and metaphors.
I did leave a bit of myself
to see deep in my poetry
hard to find at times beyond
the occasional flaw...
but not enough to close the door.
I came to this place
with a heart, with a soul.
but few to none see me.
I step out of the shadows
to join the world
but soon fade into
myself again:
where I am safe from eyes
that pierce through to
the other side of me
Editing stage:
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Comments
ThEdges
Sat, 2015-11-14 09:36
Joe,
this is powerful, and I, and I'm sure a lot of others, can relate to it.
Geremia
Sat, 2015-11-14 09:40
Yes. If they read it, joe
Yes. If they read it,
joe
Roscoe Lane
Sun, 2015-11-15 03:10
I can,
I can relate to this, every person who writes gives of themselves. You can only keep doing what you do, and in your case doing it well. Regards Roscoe...
Roscoe Llane,
Religion will rip your faith off, and return
for the mask of disbelief that's left.
Geremia
Sun, 2015-11-15 08:19
Thank you, Roscoe. You ae
Thank you, Roscoe. You ae right
joe
Sparrow
Mon, 2015-11-16 18:20
Joe
You cannot even hide in the shadows as your light is too bright, great write, Yours Ian
.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti
Geremia
Mon, 2015-11-16 22:56
Thank you, Ian. Always an
Thank you, Ian. Always an encouraging word. I fear my light ,ay not be bright enough.
joe
Sparrow
Tue, 2015-11-17 04:28
Joe
In your life you have always shone and that is still apparent, I can see many things from here and that is one of them so no worries on that point lol
You take care, out there and keep those feelings coming, Yours s always, Ian..
.
Give critique to help keep Neopoet great.
Unconditional love to you all.
"Learn to love yourself first"
Yours as always, Ian.T, Sparrow, and Yenti
Geremia
Tue, 2015-11-17 08:58
will do, Ian/
will do, Ian/
Geremia
Tue, 2015-11-17 08:58
will do, Ian/
will do, Ian/
lovedly
Tue, 2015-11-17 19:01
you are that emerald ....you are that diamond ...Joe....
you are that emerald
you are that diamond
we yearn to be
in a kaleidoscope only
your poetry glistens now
than much before
O great poet
teach me
ere we become
once
''was....''
Geremia
Tue, 2015-11-17 21:11
And you are the jewel who
And you are the jewel who shines in the dark and shows the way.
joe
lovedly
Wed, 2015-11-18 03:24
and you bring tears
again and again
I salute you all the same
take care
the world needs you
more than the ilk of me
all can that
now clearly see
even Jess maybe
but where is he?
wesley snow
Tue, 2015-11-24 11:48
Very lonely.
And it looks like a lot of poets read it.
W. H. Snow
A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley
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Geremia
Tue, 2015-11-24 12:08
I based this, in part, on
I based this, in part, on those horrible years of early childhood in America.
thanks,
joe