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Seven years are not forever

The head of our house said to me
On the day we met at the bar
West wind will bring a sudden change
Taking our woes with it away
Those who heard him thought he was drunk
Darkness hung on the path we walked
Air polluted by billows and burns
We are tired of hearing bomb blasts
We are sick with shame of bloodshed
Seven bad years are not forever

Save for the rainy day ahead
With the means in your pockets now
When things look up for you today
Place not your eggs in one basket
Spread assets to other ventures
Oil wells will dry up tomorrow
Hard time will come back nonetheless
A stitch in time saves nine, they say
Like Joe said to Pharaoh of old
Seven good years last not forever

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
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Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 

Comments

and some good poetry ... but a few too many cliches...
i think if you cut this down a little it would work better

love judy
xxx

'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)

These cliches are pronounced in the second stanza and I thought putting them there will go with the title, which is in itself a cliche. I will rework that second stanza to see if I can get the same message. Thank you for your comments and encouraging words, best wishes.

tr

A rekindled faith - Dancing in the Light

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