Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.
Seeding of a Thought
In mind seeds a thought
dwelling in the sub conscious
till births a poem
Editing stage:
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.
Comments
mand
Mon, 2014-12-01 13:07
Hi Raj
Nice senryu! Syllable count looks good to me. I like the idea that a seed of thought dwelling in the sub conscious is poised ready to give birth to a poem! Very imaginative!
Love to you!
Mand xxxx
raj
Mon, 2014-12-01 13:17
Hi Mand
Good to see you after a while. Thanks for dropping by and your comment. Good to know you liked the thought.
Much love n hugs...
raj (sublime_ocean)
judyanne
Mon, 2014-12-01 22:48
hi Raj
as Mand says (hi Mand xxx) nice senryu
i like the s alliteration (although i've been led to believe that alliteration has no place in japanese poetry - too bad if that's the case ços i like it :)
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
mand
Tue, 2014-12-02 02:34
Hi judyanne - :)
Seems we are both fans of this little gem!
raj
Tue, 2014-12-02 12:23
Hi Judyanne
Thanks for your time and comments which are always welcome. Good to know you liked this one.
much love and hope you are taking good care of yourself...
raj (sublime_ocean)
Rula
Tue, 2014-12-02 12:43
Me too
I like this little piece dear raj.
I thought you need a space in the title between "a" and "Thought"
❤❤❤❤❤❤
Please follow me on Instagram
https://instagram.com/poetry.jo?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
raj
Tue, 2014-12-02 12:46
Thanks Rula for your
Thanks Rula for your encouraging comment.
I must say you have a hawk's vision lol.....i have made the correction in the title..
Regards,
raj (sublime_ocean)