Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

Reincarnation: Subtle As It Is

First Tell:
There is a part of our lives that is of the divine!
There is a part of you that is in me!
There is a part of me that is in us all-one in all and all in one. We have heard of the tales, we have dreamt them really! A grand stage is of our one singular becoming-the grandest of them all: we surely will live just long enough to bask and to merry when the days of our grimmer past are come on us.

Second Tell:
And yay! As sinister and unrelenting as they are, we will be sprung up by the one sunny horizon of mother earth, her elements, and essence. We once were, death became a girdle, loss saw us bare of our arrogance: But by the blessings of the gods on us from the heavens, we saw light yet again.

Third Tell:
It is kind, and it is true, it is honest and it is brisk. To not be is to be, but not as in the reach of mortal eyes, for they are limited, they are fickle, they are dead-and dead they are as in now and to the morrow

Fourth Tell:
Gone and gone afar we were just as around the abysmal suburbs of LIFE-TO-DEATH. Drawn and drawn we were also to just mayhem: Mayhem amidst the air we drunk through our nostrils, mayhem within not being, mayhem knee deep as in our core. To be is a dysfunctional state: But To Remain In The Spirit Of One Old Soul Is Life In Its Truest Form.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

well versed in the way of religion, although I have some regard for resurrection and reincarnation, so I cannot speak to the accuracy of your work. I can however, say that one should be impressed at the amount of work you have put into this piece.
~ Geezer.
.

It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

Noted.
And thank you.

author comment

I like how you laid it out in sections. it is very nice to meet you!

p.s.
I'm a believer!

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Thank you so much.
I appreciate.

author comment
(c) Neopoet.com. No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.