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Reflection

The pond was so silent
I could see the reflection
of three stars
there, there,
and
there
until a breeze from the field
rose like a Fairy Queen,
disrobed herself at the
edge of the water
and in one gentle
descent
stirred the stars
within their depth
until I could see
their reflection
no more.

When her foot
again touched earth,
and the water
fell to silence,
I could see in its
reflection now
a hundred thousand
stars.

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
Revised version includes second stanza.
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

Sometimes a poem is formed from a simple observation, but actually reveals a complex thought. Lots to think about as of late, and poetry is a great tool to help cleanse one's puzzled, stirred mind.
Thank you for reading!
L

author comment

Not certain where the Fairy Queen came from and when she will return - one never knows! I love watching the breeze make its way across water. Very magical.
Thank you for reading!
L

author comment

be in the water's depth, not [their]? Great title and a scene that can be imagined from your writing. ~ geezer.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

I understand what you mean...I am trying to describe the depth of the stars themselves, their very 'souls' as reflected from the sky into the water. I will put some thought into this...
Thank you, as always!
L

author comment
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