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Prodigal Son...

A woman waits by the gate
No one comes to see her

Time doesn’t heal all the hurt

Life seems as though it’s just fate
She’s never had it’s measure

Always felt like dirt

Children’s grins and twinkled eyes
Brings near to a face of stone

A faint and somewhat smile

More than enough time gone by
She has been so much alone

Been way too long a while

Longing heart trips a hammer beat
Eyes crinkle in disbelief

The prodigal son returns

Now of course, there’s no retreat
She breathes out her soul’s relief

For in her heart; love burns

Mother, mother I’ve missed you so
I was wrong, and I sorely regret it

Please forgive my sins

Oh my son, you must surely know
I love you more than a little bit

I’m so glad you’re home again

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Last few words: 
I heard someone say that they were going home again, after leaving home on bad terms with their mother. He said he was going on Mother's Day and he was just going to show up and hoped that he would be well received. I don't know how things went today, but I hope that it went something like this.
Editing stage: 

Comments

That all went well. No matter how old we are we still need our moms.

Keep Writing,
Carrie

"Quoth said the Raven, NEVERMORE"

In wanting to be sure of the title, [so that I didn't reuse it], I looked up the title Prodigal Son. So, now what? I guess I must think of a new way to achieve the title. BTW, R.B. thank you for the only comment on this piece. ~ Geez.
.

It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

author comment

how did I miss this piece? was I in the hospital for knee surgeries at this time? I love this poem as it reminds me of one of my favorite songs, titled: "Girl Of Mysterious Sorrow" by Marc Cohn (he also did "Walking In Memphis" I enjoyed the pace and subtitles of this poem. such an under current...

*hugs, Cat

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

I was reminded of this one, after hearing that one of my wife's sons who has been gone for a long time is coming to see her. It is not a really happy occasion, as it took the news that his brother has passed from an overdose. He too had been a
"prodigal son" who never managed to make it home. We grieve for him, but understand that we did all we could for him, until at last we were forced to ban him from the house. He told people that his mother was dead, [little did he know, that a part of her died with him]. In the days passing, I can see her turmoil and the anxiousness about the reunion and how it will go. We talked with him on the phone last night and eagerly await his arrival this coming weekend. I'm supposing that there will be a new piece coming from it. Wish us luck. ~ Geez.
.

It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?

author comment

I wish you and your wife the greatest of luck! I imagine that she is anxious and hopeful? I hope this doesn't turn into a blame festival where he use guild as a weapon. I hope it turns into a healing situation. again, best of luck!

*hug, Cat

p.s.
can't for the coming poem

When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

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