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precept five confusion
they say booze is the great antagonist
abstention needs be sought in earnest
of liver, kidney, brain and bladder
intoxication's the great destroyer
the teacher said to love my enemy
if I desire to be someone worthy
so does it not seem order of divine
that I should love my spirits and wine?
.
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
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Comments
William Saint George
Thu, 2012-08-16 12:39
The last stanza packs a punch
The last stanza packs a punch. Fun and humorous write.
No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot
http://www.wsgeorge.com/
judyanne
Thu, 2012-08-16 23:15
thanks william
just a bit of fun as my brain is dry at the moment :)
love judy xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
judyanne
Thu, 2012-08-16 23:16
lol eph
they say there is no such thing as coincidence ....
is it great minds thinking alike.... or....
and stop blaming the farts on the dog !
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
Dalton
Thu, 2012-08-16 23:43
Hi Judy
A fun punchy piece. I don't drink anymore but in my day I always had a thirst on me. A mispent youth is time well spent but at some point we must leave it behind. Nice write
John
judyanne
Fri, 2012-08-17 22:16
thanks john
not really much of a drinker myself, although i did down my share in my younger days... these days i prefer to wake up with a clear head
just a bit of fun here as my head is very clear at the moment lol (there is nothing in it)
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
Ian.T
Fri, 2012-08-17 03:03
Judy
Pass the bottle let us dwell a while on the the thought that there is a drought of words..
That in its self sounds like silence, now I know that there is no such thing as silence, maybe just maybe you are not listening to the noise of life out there.
I shall sup some more and dwell on such things......................
Ah! it is that you are moving into unknown places, Yenti, Sparrow, and even Ian.T, have been there it just needs a bloody great spoon to stir the universe..
Oh! the second line of your round (Well it is time you bought us a drink or two) :- "abstention needs be sought in earnest" Does this need a TO in there to make its sense reveal itself to us ???
Excuse me for being out at the moment (My mind that is) I shall return when this fine piece has been replaced by your usual fine writing,
Yours, Ian.
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
judyanne
Fri, 2012-08-17 22:17
hi ian
thanks for the read and comments
as for the 'to' - i had it there to begin with, but it messed with the meter, and i really don't think it is needed.
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
Candlewitch
Fri, 2012-08-17 11:49
Dear Judy,
I love this wise yet humorous piece!
I partied hardy in my youth. But now that I'm older I imbibe much more sensibly when the occasion warants it.
always, Cat
*
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
judyanne
Fri, 2012-08-17 22:18
ditto cat
the old body and brain doesn't take to well to it any more
thanks for the read and comment
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
judyanne
Fri, 2012-08-17 22:18
ditto cat
the old body and brain doesn't take to well to it any more
thanks for the read and comment
love judy
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)
Ian.T
Fri, 2012-08-17 17:26
Cat
Cat drinks the cream, yet do I detect a touch of whiskey in there,
We call it Baylies here ???? LOL also there is an Irish one that the name escapes me at the moment, imbibe indeed, I will search the web to see if there is an occasion every day lol, love to you all, Yours Ian.T
.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..
judyanne
Fri, 2012-08-17 22:19
oh yes
i do like the baileys lol
xxx
'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)