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Poignant End

A tasteful spectacle
To the point
With vivid imagery I assure you
Which closed with a strange sadness
Leaving you happy in the stomach,
But distraught in the mind.
And alas
As the curtain fell
I clapped dearly in my heart
But all that was heard
Was my indifferent cough
Those who had laughed most enthusiastically,
Left the quickest,
And I,
Was now somewhat offended,
For crime had been committed against the arts,
I turned to my beloved cohorts to say,
“Did you like it?”
Only to be left with
“Yes, it was funny.”

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
How was my language use?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Last few words: 
I just came home from a movie.
Editing stage: 

Comments

I liked this satire. Did you mean "Curtain" instead of "current" in the line 8 "as the current fell"?

Regards,

raj (sublime_ocean)

Hello, thank you for reading the poem. And yes you are correct, it was supposed to be curtain. Small mistake, I'll make sure to change it. Thank you again for reading.

author comment

...about how we keep ourselves distracted. I dunno - like listening to music, knowing the beat, singing the lyrics but not thinking about the meaning or emotions...
It feels like there is a strong correlation between your experience and the structure of the poem, which made me read it a few times, very cool.

The 'curtain fell' and 'the arts' made me assume you were at a theatre/comedy show... keep wondering what film you watched. Going back on it, I'll guess it was a drama/comedy;)

_____________
If I had it my way I'd be up on a mountain. Playing my guitar,
until my calluses grew calluses, my arse a chair and my smile into a halo

like I am the only one who really gets it. But, I have stopped trying to divine what others think about movies, music or something of the arts. if they really feel it and "get it", they will tell you so. it is a basic of human nature.
Nice work, ~ Geezer

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very good piece, i enjoyed reading thank you

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