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PLATE TECTONICS

I'll blame it on tectonic plates
the kind which push the mountains higher
they move like rusty swinging gates.
In blaming them I am a liar.

Those cussed things also cause rifts
spreading valleys ever wider
as they go about their drifts
like some kind of great divider.

And all this motion's going faster
especially in these last few years
leading to personal disaster
and to vague unspoken fears.

Else why have all hills gotten steeper
and creeks harder to leap across?
Even marshes are now deeper;
this damned drifting makes me cross.

I'll blame tectonics with futile rage
it's better than to blame my age.

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
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Comments

love the satire
and it is a great excuse

rhythm mostly really good
did you mean this as iambic?
if so, a great job, but a few lines not quite there
- i'll let you know which ones if you wish
but if you didn't well and good
a fun read
love judy
xxxx

'Each for the joy of the working, and each, in his separate star,
shall draw the Thing as he sees It, for the God of Things as They are.'
(Rudyard Kipling)

Yeah, it's easier to blame that than admit that I'm not young as I used to be. I just jotted this down with more attention to plot than meter so I'm hardly suprised it's a little off...........hmm.........kinda matches the author lol.........stan

author comment

I also blame no longer being light on my feet on increased force of gravity (damn sure not on the excess girth) lol.................stan

author comment

Love it! That witty man has been at your computer again Stan, watch out, might steal your fans as well as your wife.

I would have a hard time picking my fave line, it builds so brilliantly & has a wonderful punch that one only vaguely suspects in the beginning, big grins for this one.

My only crit would be to wonder if you really need the "sure" in the last line of second last stanza? Just feels a bit cumbersome?

"this damned drifting makes me cross" seems ok & runs smoother to the rhythm (opining humbly)

Cheers
Anni

My dear friend always told me "Water the seeds of joy first"

Alas he already Got my wife lol. But maybe he'll leave both my fans alone. I think you're right about deleting sure. In fact I checked back on original hand written copy and saw that sure was added on later. Reckon I should have trusted original instincts lol. I'm glad you dropped by and pleased you enjoyed this...............stan

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