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Ode to North Station
Oh, my dearest North Station, how I love you.
The things you do are all so cool
All the people spill into your belly
End up there like cold jelly
Trying to get someplace in a race while I sit
At your heart and am a quiet part of your pit
The pit of my dearest train station that belches
You throw up all the people from your misery
And then there is me quietly taking it in
You wonder why your ass takes a pounding
Why all the rush is in such a hush that whispers
My dearest train station you are the scene seen
As I stop and hear your hungry gut rumble
How could you not be full by now you big fat cow
Chew your cud amidst the messy dung pile
Oh, my dearest North Station, how I love you
You stampede of bovine, where I meditate in your bowels
Only to see the art décor stuff plastered
Everywhere for all to be distracted and compacted
For the next five O’clock run!
Style / type:
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity):
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction):
What did you think of my title?
Editing stage:
Content level:
Not Explicit Content
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Comments
One
Thu, 2022-03-24 04:54
Mark
this is no critique, I just want to say I read it & thoroughly enjoyed the piece. You gave a real sense of the emotions & how you just sat back & observed.
It was just a fun captured moment. Sometimes a poem doesn't need to be complex, just tell it as it is & craft the images for the reader.
I observed, felt, heard, smelt & lived in the moment you recorded.
I'm originally from a place called Colchester in England & used North Station every day for about 10 years of my life to take me to London for work. Brought back memories.
Great.
Regards
One
.
"with all that I am & all that I could be, I walk this earth, yet nobody sees me"
mark
Sun, 2022-07-10 04:06
Thank you One
During that time I was into the relaxation response.
I was told that I did good and so here is the proof. :)
Mark
Be a vibrant component of our Neopoet community by talking with other Neopoets.
author commentCandlewitch
Thu, 2022-03-24 09:24
dear Mark,
I am sorry, I cannot comment properly, because I am not sure what you are writing about. it is unclear to me. but I can say that you have a style all your own.
*hugs, Cat
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
Candlewitch
Thu, 2022-03-24 10:43
thanks mark,
a very long time ago I lived in Cambridge Mass.
*hugs, Cat
When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.
mark
Sun, 2022-07-10 04:08
Cambridge is awesome
made many trips to Harvard square as a kid growing up.
There was a great park and record store there.
Mark
Be a vibrant component of our Neopoet community by talking with other Neopoets.
author commentGeezer
Fri, 2022-03-25 10:22
Sorry...
it took so long for me to get here, to tell you how much I enjoyed this one! I've seen the subway in NYC and ridden on their trains; so, I can see and understand what you are saying about the trains. I particularly like the line about the graffiti on the walls. "Only to see the art decor stuff plastered everywhere, for all to be distracted and compacted." A great line that delivers a
visual kaleidoscope. Good stuff! ~ Geez.
.
It seems that the days and hours that people
are available for chatroom are staggered and
not a good match for most everyone. How about
if everyone just shows up at the door, whenever
they have a few free minutes?
mark
Sun, 2022-07-10 04:09
Yes!
Thanks Geez
Mark
Be a vibrant component of our Neopoet community by talking with other Neopoets.
author commentRosewood Apothecary
Sun, 2022-07-10 06:27
Having been there
I can say this is pretty spot on and should be published in The Globe and The Boston Herald. Let the bovine subjects read!
Tim
mark
Sun, 2022-07-10 06:53
Yes! Yak about my lesson lol
Or my lesson for Yaks lol
Thanks for a real compliment.
Mark
Be a vibrant component of our Neopoet community by talking with other Neopoets.
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