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An Ode to Her Loneliness

She stands alone, curtains drawn,
her door is locked,
not even the birds come to flock.

She has a snake, of course it's fake,
she sits there hoping, one day it will wake.

What’s made her hide withdrawn from life?
She once was a talented poet.
The words of others played on her mind,

She had so much baggage
and could no longer find,
the road that led to poetry.

She listened to others
who were wrong,
they wanted her gone
now she’s alone,

but, her mind still has the power
to write poetic songs.

The beauty that’s inside her
she no longer wants to share,
she’s closed the door forever,
it’s left her in despair

But locked inside, never to be heard
Just seems like such a crime
no one gave her a chance,
she sits alone and cries.

Only she can hear the music,
she stands alone to dance,
writing poems and fables,
in her poetry ridden trance.

Unsure of how to break the spell
in hope someday, someone would care

it's such a loss and so unfair
this talented poet, will die there…

Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
having already learnt so much from the (title workshop) I thank all my neo friends for all the wonderful feedback.
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

it could be a page torn from the book of any poet. Fear not, thou fair and lustrous poetess. Sir Neopoet will save the day! He will rescue the fair and wonderous lady from the clutches of the odious and evil critic. He has the armor of equal opportunity and the sword of clarity. No longer will the maiden be shut up in the dungeon of the castle of Imperial B.S.! ~ Geez.
.

Honest critique and comments shouldn't hurt.
It's why we are here, to get better at our craft.

Wow looks like you could write your own book with your wonderful review. What a lovely thing to read. Yes indeed bullies have her don't they?

This is one of my personal favourite poems so I am glad I have inspired you! And of course when I need the kings knight I shall call on you!
Thank you for always coming to my rescue!

Thank you...Teddy

author comment

it is a pleasure to ride to the rescue of such an inspired poetess. ~ Geez.
.

Honest critique and comments shouldn't hurt.
It's why we are here, to get better at our craft.

You're the best sir!

Thank you...Teddy

author comment

I'm not sure what it is as I can't put my finger on it but something seems to be missing .
It just isn't you

Let your mercy spill on all those
burning hearts in hell( L.Cohen)

I hear what you are saying, I think it may be that there is not a happy ending. I know this work seems sad however it's truly one of my favourites. It was one of my very first poems so I am always interested to hear what people think. I am truly grateful for your visit. It's also interesting when I write happy poems and people think them sad. That's the beauty of showing to others and hearing what they think. My brother says I am a dark writer however I really don't see it myself.

Thank you...Teddy

author comment

you from
it loneliness produce
in or like lime juice
others may from your poem
red wine produce
you surely
I N D U CE
@ a lovely pace
now all will you trace
lol rgds

I would like to say thank you, as you actually inspired this new title with your beautiful poem that I read yesterday. This is one of my oldest poems brought back for a rebirth as I was never happy with the old title. So a huge thank you.always a pleasure to see you.

Thank you...Teddy

author comment

what a delight
15
you keep me always in sight
see titles matter
thank
scribbler

There sertainly is a great platform to learn here at neo.

Thank you...Teddy

author comment

Hi, Teddy,
This seems incredibly sad...a poet unable to express her poetry, a voice unheard. Sad. Thank goodness you are able to express yourself so well! A rich poem.
Thank you!
L

Thank you for your rich words, I think creative poetry can take us anywhere I always try different things. Great to see you!

Thank you...Teddy

author comment

...sad to me!

I liked the dead fake snake.

xxx
Edna
Poet(ess) to the Stars

The fake snake yes! lol

Probably was her only friend

How lovely to see you.

Thank you...Teddy

author comment
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