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odds n sods.......

Alex has gone on ahead.

Take it eeaasy - Alex Brown;
its time to - s l o w d o w n,
- time to do all the things
borne on the wings of
- wellll-
lucidity !
where reciprocity meets
on the junction of streets
n the neon says-

- yeah,

Take it eeaassyy - Alex Brown.


Poetry Free For All. (or, No hot ashes!)

I once heard an admin announce
that should anyone here ever flounce
they would forever be bound
to the interesting sound
of bollocks that actually bounce !

"nudie norman"

He offered up his sticky willy
and robin run the hedge,

a tempting fruit of great repute,,,,,,,,
I cooked it with the veg !!


"Tender wing"

Still thy beating breast
and quell thy raging fear,
for the battle is in the distance
and the time is not yet here,

Cast thy thoughts to distant shores
and those that lay within,
to the shires of dear old England
that keep thy kith and kin,

Smooth thy furrowed brow
and rest thy weary head,
take leave of thy senses,
and worries, thou will shed,

I’ll rouse thee son
when lines are drawn
and battle cries we’ll sing,
till then my son take shelter,
neath Morpheus - tender wing.



Biggin it up fer jesus,

When a gilded man with pearly whites
came a knockin on ma’ door
said; " hey there bro,
d'ya care to know what this
'ere book is for,
'taint for puttin on display
or keepin vampire teeth at bay
oh no bro no bro, not today;
come listen what the good book say !

Now he sure looked pretty in his stay press suit
n Vaseline slick back hair,
with his easy style n godly guile
was biggin up his good lord’s prayer,

But fragrant molasses made up myths;
man that ain't ma thing.
I'm a sixties child whoo that's wild,
I'm a screwed up ding a ling. (should have been "fucked up" but decorum took hold)

I got Dylan flowin through ma' veins
Martin luther in ma' gut,
So I need no ancient prophet claims,

-- n god can kiss ma' butt.

This ass of much significance !

O Jove, this ass of thine, so pert and tight
and Denim clad, orbs of wanton desire
that gadded man did wrest folly and smite
wretched fortitude with embolden'd fire
of lust. verily, a janus faced Goddess
temptress to the recklings of gawded cheeks.


There was an old lady from Bute,
Whose arse was still pert and quite cute
'till gravity took hold
and it slipped so I'm told
but that arse is still of great repute.
I want to scoop your marrow
I want to peel your teeth,
I want feel you lying bare beneath,

I want savour your sweet succulent meat
I want to fillet your soul make the we, complete.


"- Stipendium -"

The fare we pay for
penning rhyme
is want of sleep and
pilfered time;

But a poem is a poets
fair redeem,
when weighed against -
a dream.


I took a peek within your house
wherein upon pew I spied a mouse,
and in his hand, was a bible clasped,
and from his mouth flew a parable rasped.



In that moment, of slender breath -
when death grants purchase
to relinquished dreams
and whimseys
- free.


I didn't know him very well,
I didn't even know he'd gone,
though, what I know,
is that he was,

The Idiot,
in an Idiotocracy.


Cerebral woman,,,,,,,,,,, 'I'm a judge jail Me

she's a technicoloured melodrama
fringed in pink
a loony tune character
penned in indian ink,

She's positive and poignant
blessed with perfect poise
my snake wrangling lady-
she's one o' the boys.

She's a synaptical sexy siren
and rather refined
a whoreatical kinda woman;
that fucks with my mind,

She's passionate and pendulous
immersed in deep thought
She's my minds Mary monster

my cerebral - consort,


Could'a been a cowboy but--
my ass didn't suit the horse.

Should'a been an astronaut but--
I wandered off-- of course.

Would'a been a fireman but---
my hose was waayyy too short,

End up a bank robber but shit--------
I got my cute ass - caught.

Obi. (courtesy of Strangeways)


"- R,I,P. Po-e-try -"

Here lies the body's
o' poets Anon.
whom broke wind once
and then was gone.

so, think on this
afore ye depart,
life can be but one--
unencumbered fart.

Obious Flatulensus.


"- homunculus of grief -"

just once
before, I sang
the song of sorrows-
the song that cracks the eyes
and breaks the sanctimony of lips.


Gandhi left his sandals
on a step outside the door
they were nicked by some young vandals
whilst Gandhi 'ad a snore.
Harry Potter has grown a beard
he lives alone and turned out weird.
Dumbledore, Albus, no more
turned his toes and 'ad a snore,
Voldemort, who's ass is taut
has no nose with which to snort,
'pon the quim of slim Hermione
that easly Weasly found somewhat slime--ely.


There's a cockerel in my ear
and he bills and coos for you
whenever you are near he goes


Faith, hangs flaccid from street signs,
Hope, in the gutter lay,
Charity, is at the end of a phone line,
but the bankers have all run away.
(Bye bye Boris.)

Fully ambulatory with
onanist wrists,
neither whig,
nor tory,
nor communist,
he's loose lipped
loose hipped
quite well equipped,

he's bendy n trendy,
he's buff, n ripped.

he's not quite castrato
and gives good vibrato
to choirboys mulatto -

with belly button fluff.




I could wax on the wings of a butterfly
but, I aint that kinda o' guy.

rather kick the nuts off bastard squirrels
pull the wings off blue arsed fly.

I'm the stuff that flops off dog chops
when he's up fer it and high,

I'm a metaphor to drink s'more
I'm the toe nail in the pie.


Sphincter factor nine approaches
food for the fish n roaches,
methinks its time for me perhaps
to open up the rearward flaps.

AAChoo !!

Oh, liddle sister, Josephine,
you sure don't keep your
nose real clean.
got stalactites
o' pure pea green
my infectious sibling
snot machine.
I thought that I might shoot the breeze
with God or Mephistopheles
and ask them please to ease my wheeze
of my bad back and dodgy knees

and whilst they're at it, take a peek,
as to why my cock and arsehole leak??
Croak with the raven
bluff with the crow
the urchin
the field mouse
beneath the hedgerow
in a flurry they scurry
away away go.
Yelp with the vixen
howl with the hound
and bay at the moon
till the sun comes around.
Gino's bar and grill.

Away, away afore Bacchus
doles out befuddlement
and Morpheus has his way,
lest I awake to find myself
in the company of
sodamistic bedfellows
with buggery in mind.


Ahem !!

Behind two Lilies- sits Rose,
then Daisies
for two and a bit rows.
with Poppy, and Pansy
Petunia, Primrose.
and Bryony - who gets up
- our nose.
God bless the Cows - for beef burgers.
God bless the Pig - for their bacon.
God bless the wife n her sharp knife
for the slice of their arse she's taken.

We can, no more fetter the sea to the shore
nor the clouds to the sky
or tether the glint
in a lovers eye,
As sure as the shore loves the sea
so shall I love thee, together,
together for eternity,


It bends for thee
sweet chevin,
the cane thats cleaved
by three,
wilt thou now
sweet chevin
yield, my friend ,
for me.
There's Marmalade then Marmite
and Jams thats jammed between
the buttered bread of bard-dom
a poets sweet cuisine.
I took up campanology
and fired up my bong.
I rang that bell
to fucking hell
''till the busies
came along.
so, I've been whittling away
at a buoyant turd-
fashioned something approximating
a poo canoe-
in it, I intend to
surf the shit tsunami of old age
to-- death;
I have named it

Public - Service - Pension.


Yers,,,,,, Obadiah.

Last few words: 
Feel free to add a ditty or two.
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content


I didn't see mistakes
at least not many
Hey, what'd ya want
for just a penny?

Your odds and sods
tickled my fancy
thought I'd take a little chancy
a few myself I should write
take you up on your invite

I'm not so good as you I think
maybe "cause I smoke don't drink
but in fact I do agree
I'm not much for buggery
so I won't drink passing out
I'll stay sober and I'd shout
if they tried their way with me

a good bit of fun here! ~ Geez.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Thanks for that, Geez.
As you may have guessed by now,
its mostly about the fun for me.

Cheers, Obi.

author comment

this is hard for me to follow...

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Hiya, Ray.
I didn't know that! I guess The Who are guilty of using clichéd titles too.

These are thirteen separate "found poems" that made it into my junk pile,
I did enjoy writing most of them as they represent the lighter side of life.
Sorry to foist them upon you without an explanation.

Cheers, Obi.

author comment

Pleas, no apologies... and, Thanks for putting this in context for me, --after a re-read I think I see why you placed them in your submission!

The Who are an incredible band, or at least they would be if two of them hadn't died. Do you enjoy their music?

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what cornucopia of pure poetry! I much enjoyed!

*hugs, Cat

You should have labeled it as explicit content. or given a (Warning) in your title.


When someone reads your work
And responds, please be courteous
And reply in kind, thanks.

Glad you liked them, Cat.

*hugs, Obi.

author comment

A little ditty
I'd like to add -
yer odds 'n sods,
they're not so bad

so may I say
on my behalf
I quite welcome
a needed laugh

a bit of fun
to end the day
and fancy life
the Obi way

Clever poetry, Obi, as usual!

Haa Haa,,, Thank you for the liddle ditty L.
It made me smile !!!


author comment

Where do you get your ideas? You're like a sewer rat, running through fields of shit, but you hit the spot. Still laughing here, brilliant, but this is my favourite.
I took up campanology
and fired up my bong.
I rang that bell
to fucking hell
''till the busies
came along.

Commenting on poetry builds community, confidence, and comprehension. :)

Beer, Ruby. Beer!
Bit o' Scotch, and recently --
Bourbon.... ( I blame the Yanks)

author comment

blame those yanks for making good liquor. Now we got the best weed too! We sure can find ways to get you out of your head! LoL
~ Geez.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

~ Geez.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

(c) No copyright is claimed by Neopoet to original member content.