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A No-Tell Motel

The strangest thing had happened when
I drove home last night from work,

I'd stopped for drinks, at a place called "Pink's";
the barkeep was kind of a jerk.

I was having a slightly "off" night
but possessed enough of my charms,

heart on my sleeve, but when I did leave;
I had a woman on both of my arms.

When I woke up in the morning
and the room just reeked of sex;

I now realize, and saw with both my eyes
I had remarried my obese "ex"!

Style / type: 
Structured: Western
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
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Editing stage: 

Comments

the read. But one suggestion though, i think the last but one line will read better like this;

"I then realized and saw with both my eyes" just a suggestion though.

All the same, it made me laugh, thanks!

...I appreciate your feedback. The reason it can't be changed is, there's an internal rhyme in that particular line.
thanx, again;
doc.

Neopoet is "newtriffic" !
...from the heart, or a reasonable faxcimile;
david a. goodwin #{:>{)} @==

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