Join the Neopoet online poetry workshop and community to improve as a writer, meet fellow poets, and showcase your work. Sign up, submit your poetry, and get started.

No Matter What! (poem of the week contest)

Submitted by Candlewitch on Mon, 2022-05-23 12:51

No Matter What!

his youth was
still upon him,
although he knew it not.

when things
got a bit rough
he drew a hit of pot.

it didn't
make him wiser
confusing him instead

sitting
at the drawing table
when he should have gone to bed

not considering
any different, he knew he was right
refusing to reconsider other choices

he locked out
reason pounding in his ears
hearing only their exaggerated voices.

righteous indignation,
was his sword and shield
they held him through the night,

he knew he could win
his passion moved him on
he lost the battle, but he would win this fight

Review Request (Intensity):

I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back

Review Request (Direction):

What did you think of my title?

How was my language use?

What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?

How does this theme appeal to you?

How was the beginning/ending of the poem?

Editing stage:

Editing - draft

Contest:

Neopoem Of The Week Contest May 22 to May 28

Content level:

Not Explicit Content

Comments

Geezer

Mon, 2022-05-23 15:23

Hmmmm...

The title is a bit long, but your rhyming is pretty good.
I like the tercet form and think that I should do it
every now and then. I don't think that you need the extra [ed]
on shield. Pretty good theme. ~ Geez.
.

There is value to commenting and critique, tell us how you feel about our work.
This must be the place, 'cause there ain't no place like this place anywhere near this place.

Candlewitch

Tue, 2022-05-24 09:09