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My River of Life

Ho ‘ river of life
I dipped my toe ,
I remember,
Bubbling
churning
urgent
swirling delight,
Bubbles in French champagne,
It tickled
it seduced
it sang me to sleep
Running down my face like a veil of rainbows,
ever lapping waves,
mesmerizing
enchanting
forever without end,
this was life.

I bathed in its pure waters
ever young and gay
The years went by and day by day
Thinking youth is surely here to stay.

then a golden glow bequeath my eyes
silhouetted against the reddened sky
a boat of truth
did my river run
its name was time
for my time had come.
My friends aboard
it slow to move,
my landlords craft called in his dues,
while I hung around to play life’s dice,
but then the mirror never lies,

came the day I raised my eyes
across the river of life,

Slow of tide
the river moved,

thunder on the blooded sky,
I stood and smiled into the setting sun ,
and realized ,
my time had come.

Review Request (Intensity): 
I appreciate moderate constructive criticism
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
How was the beginning/ending of the poem?
Is the internal logic consistent?
Last few words: 
This is meant to portray an entire life with reminiscing, and reality coming to play , just an Idea?!
Editing stage: 

Comments

Thanks Ian, not my best read poem,
prob. unpopular subject
Thanks for your encouragement

author comment
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