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My Lady Fey

In the quiet of the day
I find some darkness,
come to play
upon the fringes of my mind,
in the shadow of the day.

In the gloomy mist of morn
within the fog
that shall adorn
the vista of a waning night
my love appears,
in fey, phantasmic light.

From some corner of a nightmare
does she look and does she stare
like an owl, silent, sitting,
while I, hapless, unresisting
must succumb my mind and will.

I may seem to be alone
in the landscape of my thought,
wading through a riverbed
of memories and tears shed,
but I wear a slaver's collar
for my soul is dearly bought.

All my world is thus reduc-ed
to her coming and her going.
All my passion is her passion,
and her fears are now my own,
I shall never be alone.
In this dim, occultic hue,
There comes her daemon in my view.

Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of my title?
How was my language use?
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
Last few words: 
Happy Halloween.
Editing stage: 


This is a very well done! Full of dark imagery. ( Brilliant for halloween ). I like the "out of the box" rhyming scheme - each stanza is different and yet it all holds together and in my view it adds to the effectiveness of the poem.

Thanks for sharing!

LOve Mand xxx

Thanks for liking this, mand. I'm glad you did!

No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot

author comment

Your grasp of meter is improving delightfully. This is a wonderful poem.
But I can't leave without a complaint and so...
I have trouble with this verse. I believe "succumb" needs a qualifying preposition such as "to", but that of course would screw with the meter I so liked.
"must succumb my mind and will."

W. H. Snow

A poet is a nightingale, who sits in darkness and sings to cheer its own solitude with sweet sounds. Percy Bysshe Shelley

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what will I do without your nitpicking? lol

I'm glad you showed up, and thought this was a good poem :)
Thanks a lot!

No verse is free for the man who wants to do a good job. - TS Eliot

author comment
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