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moments to remember

I refused to spend
our last minute in grief, so
(to remove this other visage
threatening a takeover)
I transposed over it

your face
with that gorgeous smile,
holding in contemplation,
a curious child, me.

then control was lost,
your eyes
swollen in sadness
with an agony
we carried together,
unmoving they
consumed me

and now,
my face burns,
with a heart
arched in sorrow,
in the knowing yours
is now reposed
in heaven

I, am ever thankful
for the gift of you,
but I will forever need
these moments
to remember

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Last few words: 
This is a tribute to someone I lost sometime ago I am still working on it but its the anniversary of her death today so I thought it appropriate to post in her memory...I have another poem celebrating her life but I am going to leave it and post tomorrow night...forever and always to my sister girl I will never forget you gorgeous xxx <3
Editing stage: 

Comments

May your beloved sister's soul rest in eternal peace. I could sense that this is not just a tribute to her but a means of connecting with her soul and clutching onto the memories made in the physical realm...

joining in your prayers for her..

raj (sublime_ocean)

She wasn't my blood sister but she was my sister in every sense of the word, your right this isn't just a tribute in a way its reflecting back on those memories this poems been a long time in the making it started more than a year ago, Today I thought I would finish this one off and finish the other one celebrating her life its nearly done I will post it tomorrow night or the night after I am working on another poem as well whichever ones finished first will get posted...

thank you for your kind prayers my friend

love and hugs JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

Its good that you can relate to the memories here. I have 5 sisters,My eldest sister died many years ago. Can't really remember much about our time together 'cos I was very young then .She passed away when I was in kindergarten due to heart problem.Mum says its because of the smoke she inhaled while working at the factory, trying to help with the family's financial. All I have is a picture of her in the family album...

love and hugs
Alid

That's so sad my friend, just because you don't remember much doesn't lessen the loss.

I am so sorry to know this, my heartfelt sorrow at your loss my friend

with much love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

As you are to me, so your Sister is to you.
There are bonds that hold the universe together,
with a strength that has such a beauty in its thoughts and colours of pure energy then so it is.
A lovely tribute to another that has touched your ways.
If you look there are so many of them with you always.
Yours Ian.T xx

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

As you are to me, and 'always' will be

They are there, sometime I think I feel them, I might have a dream and the residual essence is still there when I wake up. its comforting and sad at the same time.

take care hun

much love always JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

There is a residual sadness in many things,
the sense of not achieving perfection is the main one,
but it is surrounded by a beauty you can only think of.
Never carry any sadness into the day from your dreams,
They are sent to rest your ways
Not to irritate your awareness of a sadness.
Dream on young lady it is a healing thing.
Maybe you feel sad at having to leave their presence
Because as you wake so they must hand over to you the day things.
Have a lovely Night, Yours Ian & the Children..x

.
There are a million reasons to believe in yourself,
So find more reasons to believe in others..

Sometimes it would be nice to just stay in the dream eh ? hugs

love always JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

This is beautiful poetry.

It's strange, that when I first read this, I didn't even know that the last verse was there. I thought the poem ended with "heaven", and it was only after coming back to read again that I discovered the last verse.
And do you klnow, I didn't think that this needed that last verse? I was left with some powerful emotions when I first read the poem, and so, for me, reading it again, it seemed that the last verse was somehow, well, superfluous, an added extra stanza that didn't need to be there.
But that's just me; I thought this poem to be powerfully sad, and the last verse brings with it the conclusion of memory, that your loved one will not be forgotten.

Damned good Jayne, damned good!

<<large virtual hug>>

Keep writing sister.

Respectfully, Jim

"Laws and Rules don't kill freedom: narrow-minded intolerance does" - Race-9togo

http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/Race_9togo

Hmmm you got me thinking about deleting that last stanza, maybe to finish in heaven so to speak is a better place to end the poem ... I am going to edit this one in a couple of days I will consider it, I am leaning towards deletion ...

thanks for your thoughts hun they are always appreciated hope your doing better, so glad you liked this one

(((((((((hugs))))))))

much love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

There's still time to create more beautiful memories yet.

Alid

Time is such a intangible thing, what time do any of us have?, we just have to make memories as time carries us along life's road..

love and hugs JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

that's why we must make the most of what we have as and when we can.You can't choose how long you will be alive but you can choose what to do with your life. that's free will. one thing you must not do is exist. A rock exist. As a human we must live.

love and hugs
Alid

Ah but to live, really live, that's the challenge ;) big smile

love and hugs JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

still, that's the beauty. Life without challenge can be booorrring!

love and hugs
Alid

:)

love JC x

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

I think I have said it too soon. Having trouble with the weird display of the neopoet site. Its making me mad, I tell ya.Me and my big mouth...

Dear God, if you are listening
please ignore the fool's last comment..
I'd rather have boring than be driven half-mad
with frustration
the reign of complication
making me cross-eyed and screaming like crazy
i rolled my eyes heavenward, feeling dizzy
oh please spare us all
set us free!pretty pleeeeease! (blinking rapidly)

love Alid

No offence given or taken my friend ;) nothing to forgive big hugs

love JC xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment

:).

love
Alid

hugs xxx

("Always and Forever") - (Never lose a holy curiosity.-Albert Einstein)

author comment
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