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" Missing you "

Waking up feels robotic
Each of my rigid movements synchronized
With the ticking time bomb in my head
Ready to go off with each thought of you that
passes through my brain

I sleep and dream, long and hard
Hoping that when i wake
I'll hear your melodious voice ringing through my ears,
so soft yet firm

Because ive had enough of missing you

I feel like a puzzle missing a piece
like a piece of paper but just a sheet
the start of a sentence....
Just incomplete

My emotions hit harder than ever around this
time of year.
I'm tired of living in this constant fear

My mind.
My mind is a constant shipwreck
The waves of rage and sadness wanting to
engulf what is left of your memory.

I NEVER want to miss you again
But there is nothing in the world
that will EVER
stop me from missing you, again

Style / type: 
Free verse
Review Request (Intensity): 
I want the raw truth, feel free to knock me on my back
Review Request (Direction): 
What did you think of the rhythm or pattern or pacing?
How does this theme appeal to you?
Editing stage: 
Content level: 
Not Explicit Content

Comments

your last stanza in my opinion needs a rewrite

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This poem touched me. I feel your pain. I have lost both my grandfather (a couple years ago) and my great grandmother
(last week) I don't know who or how you lost someone, but I hope you find peace in your pain. I wrote a poem similar to this one its called "Without you". Its for my best friends since i can't see them face to face. It was originally a song, and i think you should turn yours into a song too. Share it with others who miss that person. It helps
I miss those days, I miss those lives
when all was recognized
a smile on my face, seeing you everyday
but now I'm lost, and nothing can be found
here at home, all alone
my feet won't leave the ground
So take my heart and hold it close, and never let me go
Cause I will cry all of my life, until we reunite
cause without you my soul is lost, and without you I'll never be found
Cause I see your faces in my head, lying awake in my bed
I miss your smile and tender hugs
Did I ever tell you I miss your love

Vivi
(Love hanging with my family of poets)

I agree with c lynn brooks
on the last line
maybe try

These oceans of sorrow threaten to swallow me whole
And I never want to feel this way again
But as the ocean's waves have to crash
I will keep missing you till the end

Vivi
(Love hanging with my family of poets)

Hi Arriak, a very powerful poem, almost a diatribe. I understand you well, I've lost several loved ones, two sons and my parents, cousins, uncles and aunts, nobody left except my daughter, who lives alongside of me.
I agree with lynn's suggestions. The content is clear (I think), the spacing is well done and I emphasize with the theme.
I'll return for another read, all the best, Gracy

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"My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies; fairy tales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly, my friends.” – Freddie Mercury

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